Well the whole point of life I guess is feelings,heart breaking memories,death,a beginning of new things,bravery,courage,and people who bully and make people's life miserable, believe it or not I was a person much like that but I just wanted to fit in I didn't realise what I was doing all those times but one day it hit me I don't know what but it hit me hard and made me realise i was a bully and worse it began to turn on me and I guess I deserved every last bit of it I didn't realise how hard I hurt people physically and mentally but I knew when it was happening to me I was a bad person I thought it was okay to block them out but me trying to just made it worse because I now hade doubt in my self much like I did to those people but I didn't realise how much it was building up in side me and my best friend Lilly looked up typed of depression because I was hurting my self harming me mentally and physically I wasn't fully depressed I hade bipolar disorder and it's funny you know because the more I tried to think I was innocent but I wasn't ,it was all my fault me getting carried away with life I forgot how to be normal.
Now to talk about me well I am from Perth (wanneroo) and I am a person you could say easy to put down I am a very sensitive 12 year old girl that lives in Busselton and I go to cape naturalise collage and I try to be normal I mean I'm not popular at all and I have a few friends but at least they accept me for who I am so that is all I need,oh and if you have been wondering about my family well I'm not close to them at all I mean I have 4 sisters and 2 brothers my parents are kinda always stressed and I all ways have a thing in my mind all the time knowing I'm growing up with them and my dream parents are never going to come true but I guess some how it is probably my fault I just can't stop thinking about my friends have perfect lives and they treat there life as nothing thinking it's bad but I would do any thing to be were they are right now .so as you can tell my life isn't probably like yours but if your reading this and your like me well stay strong as every keeps saying that something good will always happen and honestly probably unlike you I don't believe that stuff but what ever I guess . And I had dreams about what will happen in my life but I don't anymore I just wait till it happens I wait till it's all gone every one tells me to call the help lines about my parents being mean or me feeling how I do but some were in side I don't know many I love them or I'm scared I don't know and honestly my parents don't know how I feel because I put on a shield around them like I'm so happy but when I turn corners away from them I'm so upset and hurt but what ever it is I can't do it so I have to do this on my own so if your reading this thanks for giving in time to read this little thing of mine and I will write more of these little story's so thank you .
Well sounds like my life sucks right ! But compared to other people in worse condition I'm nothing . But with my shit life my nan recently passed away I was holding her hand in the hospital and telling her" I loved her and we would all be together one day "after I kissed her four head and said I loved her for the last time a tear dripped slowly down my face and just like that it happened she told me 'not to leave' like she new it was time to go ,but before I could say something all the machines made loud beeping noises then the nurses pulled me back wile more tears rushed down my face I knew she was gone I just wanted to have hope but I new nothing could bring her back. I guess these things happen and there's nothing you could do or that's what every one kept saying. I keep thinking that maybe I didn't have to wait to see her again but I know it's hard for every one else if I took my life but doesn't it matter what I feel wile they feel pain I can finally be happy but no one understands . I just wish that for once I could be normal I guess.
But when I'm with my best friend Lilly carlyle she makes me feel like I'm really important to someone,like a girl,like a happy person she makes me smile and laugh I love her.
And the best part is she knows what I'm flinging through and she thinks on the good side of things. I love you Lilly your not just my best friend your my every thing xx
