Love Culture

5 | reminiscences culture pt.1

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It was nearly 8:30 PM at night. The topic of Vinaya's admirer was abandoned as everyone focused on studying for their upcoming exams. It was hell week, after all, and they all wanted to get out of it unscathed. With the exception of Sahil, who only wanted to stare at Zara's serious and focused face. 

He did receive a wack on the head for it and a "Focus on your studies, Sahil!".

As they all trudged back to their dorms, Vinaya grimaced. The pain shooted up from her ankle straight to her brain as she regretted her decision of wearing heels. In her defense, the pants that she had worn for the day looked amazing with heels. A little pain was necessary for beauty. But now, Vinaya thought, the level of pain she was in was not worth it. 

She desperately wanted to rid herself of her heels and walk barefoot in her room, comfortably, when Karan piped up, "Why don't we go the games center? Let's take a short study break before the midnight cramming session."

"Yes! Let's do that!" Sahil agreed enthusiastically. He was always up for anything other than studies. To her surprise, Zara and Ada nodded along, murmuring that they were tired of all the constant exams and wanted some refresher. Vinaya wanted to go but her heels situation forbade her from feeling any joy about the turn of events. 

"Sit here." Aryan whispered in her ear, gesturing at the bench. Vinaya's eyebrows scrunched, "Why?"

She didn't receive a response. Aryan placed his bag on the bench and hurried away. The other four in the gang watched them confused. 

"You guys move on ahead. We'll be there in a few."

Zara's eyes twinkled with understanding and promise that Vinaya was definitely getting teased for this before grabbing Sahil's arm and sauntering away. Ada and Karan, too, followed behind the couple, laughing about some inside joke of theirs. They seemed to have a thousand of that. 

Vinaya leaned back against the bench, staring at Aryan's black bag. It was an ordinary bag, but it brought her some semblance of comfort every time she looked at it. Today, she hadn't been able to fully concentrate on her studies. 

It had been filled with revelations about herself. She had a serious crush on Aryan, to the point that she'd do literally anything to get him to notice her. Thankfully, it appeared he, too, had some interest in her. There was no way for her to confirm it, other than a direct, tactless approach which she didn't want to undertake, but she felt sure about it. All his little reactions hadn't gone unnoticed by Vinaya. 

She let out a small puff of air, as she felt herself slipping into the ocean of memories that the two had inevitably made. 

Her lips trembled as Vinaya stepped down from the stage - her first ever stage - and forcefully kept herself from running away to some secluded place. Her peers around her, comforted her, while cursing the horrid crowd.

"Hey, you did well, okay? Don't be too sad about this. Everyone's first time is like this."

That was what they all seemed to say in different words. Vinaya wanted to scream that they were all wrong. She hadn't done well. To say she was upset was an understatement. She was frightened now. She wouldn't dare go up on stage now. 

She quietly disappeared to the small cloakroom behind the stage. Before she could let loose and cry, she noticed there was another person in the otherwise empty room. Aryan. 

"Are you alright?" He asked, glancing at her briefly before packing up the paints and chart papers on the class's behalf. He had undertaken the cleaning job while the class performed for the weekly assembly on stage. 

"Yes." She lied. 

"You shouldn't blame yourself too much, you know?" Aryan said in his usual quiet way, as he folded the fabrics. "There's a scientific reason for it. Your voice shakes a lot when you're terrified."

She already knew that. 

"It's because your body is in fight-or-flight response. It wrongfully senses that you're in danger and kicks into that mode. It's an animalistic part of us, I guess."

Vinaya blinked. She felt the wave of tears disappear from her behind her eyes and her throat. Was that what it was? Just her body kicking into that response he mentioned?

"That's all it really is." He said, as if he had read her mind. "But you braved through it."

Had she?

"You fought against your body's natural response, stood there and completed your speech. That's great, you know?"

Vinaya felt herself ease into the discomfort she still felt. Maybe...she had done her best. It may not have been what she expected but...she had tried to push out of her comfort zone. 

That hadn't been the only time he had comforted her, whether he had meant to or not. He was always coming to her rescue like a damn prince charming. Except...a quieter prince charming without all the sunshine and unnecessary sparkle. 

Like the time he had helped her in 8th grade when she first got her period.