THE JOURNEY HOME

CHAPTER 15: BELIEVE

'There was a fire in our home, it was so hot. I picked you up and I picked the baby, without thinking because we were all in the same room. I picked him up, I know I did. He was in my arms, crying, I soothed him and then I took you both into the portal hall where we would be safe. I remember the smoke, it got everywhere, I could barely see. That was the day you found out what I was. I never wanted you to know, I wanted us to continue to live like any other family. I tried to go back for her but I couldn't, I couldn't go through the portal anymore no matter how hard I tried. I know she was crying for me. I remember hearing her call for me so loudly, and I thought I would come back. I just wanted to get you two to safety first, you and the baby, but then I couldn't go back. I kept trying, but I couldn't and when I looked back-' Mrs. Rose broke down in sobs.

'It's alright, it's not your fault' came her husband's soothing voice.

'But it is! I should have known better. I should have known what the baby's gift was. I should have been more careful. I should have known that it was likely to be activated under duress. I should have known'

'There's nothing you can do about him now. He's gone, my dear. We should be happy she survived the fire.' He ended the sentence with a wheezing cough.

Mrs Rose, who had been pacing back and forth rushed to his side, holding him gently.

'It's such a shame, with my ability, the one person I want most in the world to heal is ill and there's nothing I can do. I just feel so powerless' Tears rolled down Mrs. Rose's cheeks and he reached over and wiped them off with a bandaged hand.

'Shh. You're not powerless. You already saved me once. I owe you my life'

'It doesn't really feel like I saved you though.' Her eyes looked over her husband's frail body.

Kenneth looked absolutely pitiful. He was wrapped with bandages from head to toe. Barely any of his skin was visible and he lay on the bed, barely able to move.

'It's not your fault I'm like this. You tried your best' He comforted her, each word was heavy with the physical strain that talking caused him.

'If only I knew what the consequence of taking a mortal into the portal hall was, I would have...' Her words trailed off. She stared up at the ceiling, and the memories came rushing back.

Would have what? She asked herself internally. Left him in the fire? Taken him outside, and left her baby and daughter inside? Once again, she remembered the hopelessness she felt that day and sighed.

On days like this, she wondered how different things would have been if only Kenneth was one of them, a faerie. Her family would be whole. The four of them would have relocated together, or not at all. Afterall, her forced relocation was part of her sentence for taking a mortal through a portal. Mrs Rose glanced down at her badge. She was a 'decorated soldier' and had won many awards for her performance on the field, but all that didn't mean much to her while she and her husband were still in confinement. The awards she won under compulsory service almost felt like a mockery, they stung. She was their prisoner, nothing more.

'Won't you relocate into the city?' Kenneth asked, turning painfully to face her.

Rose's annoyance showed. Once again he was asking if she would abandon him and go live in the city of Legandanl. Due to mortal's inability to physically withstand the pressure and atmosphere of Legandanl, a special confinement was built in the outskirts of the city; it was designed for any unfortunate mortal who wandered into the city. This was where Rose and Kenneth spent the past years of their confinement. Rose had decided not to go into Legandanl and avoided the place as much as she could. There was something irresistible about the city, the way it felt like home, it drew her kind in. It was the only place where they rightly belonged and all who went in found it very hard to stay anywhere else. The attraction was so great that only the sight of the place was enough for most faeries to abandon everything they had once known for their homeland. The idea wasn't a bad one, but Kenneth ought to know by now that Rose would never abandon him.

'We'll go when you're better'. Her voice had a tone of finality.

'And what if I never am?' Kenneth asked, his eyes apologizing for being who he was, for not being a faerie.

'Then we'll never go!' She exploded exasperated. 'You know I don't like it when you talk like that.'

'I'm sorry sweetheart. I know.' He wheezed and coughed.

'I'm sure we'll discover someone with a gift that can heal or at least help you soon. Don't lose hope'

'Of course, I won't', He grunted.

Kenneth had already lost all hope. His condition had never been cured in the past and according to the specialists, he had less than a year in Legandanl time to go. At this point, he didn't even feel sad to go. He was ready for all the pain to end but he couldn't tell his wife that, so he pretended like he still believed he would get better for her sake while eagerly anticipating the end. She couldn't understand what it felt like to be in constant pain. The very air in Legandanl was toxic to him. It vitalized his entire body beyond its limits and his body couldn't contain all the energy. It was basically bursting with life. That was why his wife couldn't heal him, he wasn't sick, quite the opposite, the superabundance of vitality within him was what was killing him.

'But honey' She suddenly asked, 'What if our baby's still alive? What if he's stayed safe all this time somehow.'

'We've been over this, Rose' her husband was empathetic but severe. He didn't want her to have any false hopes, he knew it would crush her to find out the truth all over again. Rose had proven to be obstinately delusional about their son's death. 'You know, there's no way he would have survived the fire.'

'I know but what if he did' Her eyes had the faintest of hopes.

'Why are you suddenly bringing this up, Rose?' Kenneth asked, worried about his wife's sanity.

'I haven't told you about this but I just discovered that Pearl, the oracle, has the ability to search through the past and follow a person's life. She did it right before me, she searched out the past and identity in the life of a threat whose identity was impossible to locate in the present. If our baby is alive, she can check, she can let us know' Mrs. Rose's hope rose as she spoke, as though she convinced herself more with each word.

'No' Kenneth's answer was like a bucketful of ice cold water.

'What do you mean no?' She asked in shock.

'I don't want you to go through the emotional heartache of losing our son all over again' Kenneth spoke as firmly as he could in such a frail state.

'Kenneth, look, I know you think there's no hope but the last day I saw Ophelia, we went to the old house and I heard my son call me. He called for me.'

'Oh, Rose' Kenneth looked worn, 'Please, stop this madness' For the second time that day, he worried for her mental state.

'I know what it sounds like that's why I didn't tell you, but I know it was him, I could feel it. He's alive, Kenneth. He should have a chance to meet his parents. Who knows where he lives, if they treat him well, if he's loved. I won't leave my son again because you can't find it in your heart to believe that he could still be alive'

At this point, Kenneth realised that her mind had already been made up before coming to see him. So he gave in and conceded with a slight nod.

'Sure, Rose, whatever makes you happy' He was too exhausted to argue. A huge, tender kiss landed on his forehead.

'I love you, thank you so much. You won't regret this' Rose was elated, but he just grunted in response. She left soon after, mentioning something about meeting the portal lords. While Kenneth waited for the inevitable result of checking if their son was still alive.