Always there

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hai. after so many years, so many attempts to let you go. i dont't think that i failed. it's just that, its taking a long process. i wish to believe this, don't mind me.

idea yg duduk di barisan paling belakang dalam kepala aku, ialah kita sebenarnya could make it. we could happen. tapi ada sebab kenapa dia duduk di barisan paling belakang. sebab dia yg paling terakhir hadirkan diri. dan idea itu sekarang cuma tinggal bayang bayang. entah ada atau tidak. mungkin aku yg rasa sendiri, padahal sebenarnya dia tak pernah ada. tak tahu aku.

i started to think. did everything that we went through, was just a lie? did you were really honest with your words and action? did you ever feel the same towards me? because i cannot recall the sincerity you showed to me. most of time when i'm having this thought, i just shrugged it off because it always left me hanging with no answer.

barangkali kau harus lebih jelas dengan kata kata yg kau ucap pada aku. lihat saja sampai hari ini, walaupun kita sudah masing masing dan aku hanya mampu terbitkan ucapan agar kau masih ingat dengan kenangan yg kita cipta; aku masih tertanya-tanya tentang semuanya.

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