Ode to the Lovers (Yoongi × YN)

"Cause I just wanna heal you!"

Yoongi- I love u so much.
Jun hui- I love u more.
Yoongi- u don't understand. I love you to the extent that I want my children to look like you. I love you to the extent that I wanna see u getting older, to see your wrinkled skin and face, to see your gray hairs.
Jun hui- (blushing) but that doesn't change the fact that I love u more.
Yoongi- u won't get it. (Pulling her by her waist in a deep kiss)
(It was at this moment, when her eyes open up with a jolt! She wakes up,sits hugging her knees. Her whole body is covered with sweat, although it is raining heavily outside. She checks the clock. It was 3 am. She goes bathroom and looks at the mirror.)
Jun hui- look at yourself, Jun hui! How pathetic you are! Getting dreams of a guy who doesn't give a fuck about your existence. (Smiling sadly, she washes her face. She doesn't remember the last time she slept properly.)
(She knew she can not sleep now, hence she opens her journal and starts writing.)

My Letter For The One That Left- 156
You always told me you loved me and yet you left as if I was nothing to you.
You always used to hope that our children get my beautiful eyes, and yet now, u are the one who makes my eyes hurt by the heaviness of tears.
You were the one who said I was special and yet got away as if I was a rock, with no feelings and emotions indeed.
Now, since u have left, what am I supposed to do?
How am I supposed to trust the words of others if u, after making all those promises, after using all those words of affirmation,  can just go away, with no explanation?

(Thus, she writes her 156th letter to Yoongi, which she knows would never reach him. But somehow, writing gives her peace. Atleast she feels good under her skin. "Good" might not be the correct word. "Survive". Yea, survive might be the word. Atleast she can "survive" under the skin. Atleast she can "survive" the pain.)

(It is morning now, school time. The breakfast table is arranged with Jun hui's fav pancakes. However, she has no appetite.)
Jun hui's mom- baby.. come have breakfast.
Jun hui- Ani..  I am not hungry, I gotta go early today.
(Saying so, she just leaves. She takes her bicycle and pedals as quickly as she could, reaches the cafe, where she usually does her morning study. The atmosphere of the shop is quite comforting.  Again, comforting might not be the correct word. "Support of survival". Yea, it is the correct word. She sits at her regular place, and the batista comes.)
Barista- would u like your regular order?
Jun hui- yea. Americano.
(Barista smiled.)
(Jun hui has changed weirdly. She stopped eating out. And whatever monthly allowance she gets from her family, she just spends at the coffee shop, specifically americano. Just that, and nothing else. Caffeine gives her power. Power to do mundane tasks. Caffeine is the only reason she can work, day in and day out. )
(The barista bought her americano. She had given her extra coffee pouches.)
Jun hui-(looking at her to do list) so today, physics, maths Chem... I will Need to solve pyqs of all that and also have to stay extra time. So I need more Caffeine. (Hence, she added three extra pouches. She drank the whole coffee in one go. After her americano, she started studying. She took out her book and started solving the question. )
(She took put her mechanical pencil, bubbling the omr sheet. And that was when her hands started to shiver. Her whole body got stiff but her hands, they just shivered. She wasn't able to catch her breathes. The barista observed her)
Barista- mam, is something off?
(Jun hui's hands and legs were just shaking vigorously and she wasn't able to speak. Her eyes just had some teardrops.)
-umm Jun hui?
(She heard a familiar voice. She turned around and saw sun jae)
(Sun jae came there and Sat on her bench.)
Jun hui-sun..Sun sun jae..
(He held her hand and rubbed them.0
Sun jae-(singing)

There goes heartbeat, cause u are the reason
I am loosing my sleep, please come back now.
There goes my mind racing, and you are the reason.
That I'm still breathing
I need you now!
(Holding her hands more, gently rubbing her back)
I'd climb every mountain, swim ever ocean
Just to be with you
And fix what I have booked
Cause I need you to see, that you are the reason.

(He holds Jun hui's hands and rubs her head)
Sun jae- Jun hui... calm down. Everything would be OK. I am with you. (He kept rubbing her palms and head. Slowly, Jun hui calmed down.) Everything would be fine, Jun hui.
(Slowly, Jun hui's lips curves into smile. Sun jae also smiles at her. )
(They both went out of the cafe.)
Jun hui- thanks sun jae. U saved me.
Sun jae- I should say thanks to you for that day! U literally saved my life.
Jun hui-huh? how?
Sun aje- your words, your advices are exactly what I needed. And they are exactly what I need every damn day. Thanks a lot, Jun hui!
(She smiles and starts walking)
Sun jae- Jun hui..
Jun hui- hmm?
Sun jae- what is it that hurted u like that?
Jun hyi- huh..? What do u mean?
Jun hui- I guess u know exactly.  No matter how much u try, your eyes will just reveal it all. Your eyes, they can not hide secrets.
(Smiling at her.)
Sun jae- open up to me. I want to know u.
Jun hui- why?
Sun jae- it's cause just because.
Jun hui- huh?
Sun jae- yea. I just wanna know u.
(Smiling more.)