Dazai: YOURE SO PATHETIC (shoots Akutagawa)
Akutagawa: Please sir, can I have a piece of bread (stomach growls like the creature cock)
Dazai: NO SLUT! DANCE ON THAT POLE RN BEFORE I EAT YOUR SISTER AND PUT HER ON THE NAUGHTY LIST
Akutagawa: But sir, shes been a good girl (cries) (coughs) (coughs again)
Dazai: QUIT COUGHING YOU ASMATIC (slur)
Akutagawa: (cuts himself and cries himself to sleep like an emo british orphan)
Dazai: DEEPTHROAT THIS!! (shoves Gojo shaped creature cock down his troat)
Akutagawa: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO COUGH COUGH COUGH COUGH (fucking dies)
In heavan...
Jesus: Akutagawa, you shall be reincarnated as this prissy shit from black butler
Akutagawa: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO (coughs more)
Akutagawa then becomes Ciel from black butler
Ciel/Akutagwa: Butler, murder those prositutes, they're too whoreish, unlike me, who just got molested
Sebastian: I'd have to kill you too, afterall, you're a prositiute, and I'm one hell of a butler
Ciel: I'M GOING TO FORCE YOU TO GET IMPREGNATED
Sebastian then gets married to Fem Russian Remy and they have a child.....Fyodor🥺
Fyodor: googoo gaga
Sebastian: Ew get this kid a bottle of vodka and nuclear missle
Fyodor: (begins reciting the bible)
Sebastian: wtf is wrong with this kid (throws him out the window a liiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiittle too hard and throws him to Russia)
Ciel: Sebastian make me walk
Sebastian: yes sir
Ciel: Brush my teeth
Sebastian: Yes you incopitent shit
(Sebastian then brings him to Japan, because he was too incopitent to do it himself)
Dazai: Wow Sabrina Carpenter, we're so similar and relatable!
Ciel: GET HIS FLAT ASS!!! EXECUTE HIM VIA THE ELECTRIC CHAIR
Fyodor: Daddy?
Sebastian: OH NO HE FOUND ME
Nikolai: yes kitten?
Fyodor: SHUT UP YOU WHORE I WAS TALKING TO MY ACTUAL FATHER NOT YOU SLUT
Nikolai: (sigh) (rides creature cock) (shoves XXL Jumbo Tampon up ass in aestetically pleasing fashion)
Sebastian: Sadly, Fyomid, I cannot be your father, as I am one hell of a butler
Fyodor: UGH! (Throws bible)
Sebastian then burns
Ciel: WTF MAN- I CANT DO SHIT BY MYSLEF- HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO BRUSH MY TEETH NOW????
Dazai: ITS TIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIMEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!
(Cue the music!)
Mariah Carey: I hear a song coming on!!!
Then they all dance to All For Christmas Is You in perfect unison, with Sebastian for Ciel because he's too incopitent
(Dhar Mann Voiceover)
So you see, you should always respect your elders, and study hard in school, and look both ways while crossing the road- and hold a parent's hand.
HEY DHAR MANN FAM! I HOPE YOU ENJOYED THIS ABSOLUTE BOP!!!!!! GO KILL YOURSELF!!!
YOU ARE READING
Dhar Mann x BSD Collab
FanfictionEpic tales from the Dhar Mann universe but its BSD and after a certian point it stops being Dhar Mann and just becomes a fanfic Co-written with @notgrace_y
