Reckless Love

Chapter Ten Part II* The Reason

You guys are free to go, the detention teacher says, her voice flat and unenthusiastic.

Finally, I sigh in relief, grabbing my bag and slinging it over my shoulder. I head for the door, eager to escape the suffocating atmosphere of the classroom. I really hate school it's boring and way too easy. The teachers are always on my case about bumping me up a grade, which would speed up my graduation, but it would also yank me out of the only class where I have Josh one of the few friends I have. It's a stupid dilemma, but a dilemma all the same.

I push open the heavy school door and step out into the cool air, ready to head home when I hear a voice calling me back.

Mr. Diaz, wait!

I turn around and see Mr. Harvey, my homeroom teacher, hurrying toward me with a slightly concerned look on his face.

Glad I caught you before you left, he says, adjusting his glasses. You're close to Miss. Wilson, right? She forgot her homework.

Wilson. That's Lynn's last name or at least the one the orphanage gave her before I found her.

Uh, yeah, I can give it to her, I say, shrugging. We're neighbors. I hold out my hand for the papers, hoping this won't drag on too long.

Mr. Harvey hands me the papers with a grateful nod. Thanks. Oh, and could you ask her if she's okay? She's been looking a little down lately.

Out of all the teachers at this crummy school, Mr. Harvey's the only one who actually gives a shit about his students. The rest of them are too busy lecturing me about my grades to care about anything else.
Will do, I say with a smile, though it feels more like a reflex than anything genuine. I turn and head for the door.

I've always been good at that faking a smile, faking any emotion, really. Sometimes I don't even know what I really feel. It's easier to just shut it all down and keep moving forward.

As I walk home, I can't stop thinking about what Mr. Harvey said. What's bothering Lynn? She's usually so upbeat, always finding some way to make me laugh, even when everything's falling apart. But lately... something's off.
I walk past a display window of a jewelry store and stop, maybe I could get her something to cheer her up girls like jewelry right?
I stop, my hand hovering over the door. What am I thinking? I know better than to spend money on things we don't need. We're already struggling, just trying to make ends meet.

But for some reason, when it comes to Lynn, I can't think straight. The thought of her smiling, opening a gift, and knowing it's from me... I feel this weird tug at my chest.

I shake my head, trying to clear it and keep walking home. I close my eyes for a moment, imagining what Josh would say if he were here. Are you kidding me? Why would you waste money on garbage we don't need?

But then I picture Lynn's face, her eyes lighting up with that smile that always makes me forget everything else. I sigh and turn around.

When I get home, I push open the front door, the familiar creak echoing in the quiet. The lights are off, except for the faint glow from the TV, its flickering blue light casting shadows over the room. I take off my shoes and move quietly through the living room.
And then I see her. Lynn, passed out on the couch. Her small frame curled up. This is the first time I've ever seen her sleep, and something about it makes my chest tighten. She looks so peaceful, so vulnerable in this moment. I think it might be a trauma thing always keeping guard, never letting anyone see her like this. I get it in a way I'm like that too. Sleeping is when you're most at risk, when you're most exposed.

I silently walk over to her, trying not to disturb her. I gently reach for the blanket, hoping to pull it over her without waking her. But just as my fingers brush the fabric, she jolts upright, her eyes wide with panic. She grabs my hand and twists it behind my back with surprising strength.

Ow, ow uncle, uncle!

As soon as she realizes who I am, her grip loosens. She blinks at me, her eyes still wide with shock, then quickly looks away. Oh, Damian, it's just you. I-I'm sorry.

I wince a little, rubbing my arm where she twisted it. Dang, for such a small girl, you're strong, I say jokingly.

Her face softens, but there's a touch of embarrassment in her expression. I'm sorry. I... didn't know it was you, she murmurs, her voice trailing off, quieter than usual, like she's retreating into herself.

Something in the way she speaks makes my heart sink. I feel this sudden wave of protectiveness wash over me. I move closer and gently place my hands on her shoulders, Hey, it's okay. I know you didn't mean to, I say in a soft, comforting voice. She tenses for a moment, and then, slowly, she relaxes under my touch.

I can feel the tension thick in the air. She looks like she's holding something back. Hey, uh... is something wrong? You've been kinda down lately, I ask, trying to keep my voice steady, but I can hear the hesitation in it.

She hesitates, eyes darting to the side as she fiddles with her bracelet. Yeah, I'm just... dealing with some stuff, she murmurs, her voice barely above a whisper. She doesn't look at me when she says it, and I know there's more to the story, but I don't want to push her.
I nod, forcing myself to respect her space. I want to be there for her, but I don't want to come off too strong. Soo, uh... are you free tomorrow? I try to sound casual, but my words stumble out awkwardly, betraying the nerves I can't quite hide.

She blushes, just enough to tint her cheeks, and suddenly my heart skips a beat. The way she looks when she gets shy it's like a punch to the chest. Her voice stammers out,

Y-yeah, I'm free.

I almost can't believe she said yes, My face is hot, C-cool, um... meet me after school I blurt out before I can second-guess myself. My brain feels like it's on fire, everything coming out all at once. I turn and run to my room, needing space to breathe and process.

Our apartment is tiny, just two rooms, so I ended up sharing with Josh now that Lynn's staying with us. I feel bad about it Josh had to give up his room, but he doesn't make a big deal of it. He's one of those guys who thinks it's "inappropriate" for boys and girls to share a room, so he never puts up much of a fight.

I close the door behind me with a soft click and throw myself onto the bed. The weight of the blanket feels comforting, as I pull it over my head. Everything seems to quiet down for a second.

I pull my flip phone from my pocket, I start scrolling through some pointless game, trying to distract myself from the swirl of thoughts. I don't really care about the game, but the rhythm of it is soothing. My mind keeps drifting back to her, I never thought I'd ever feel this way I always thought the idea of love was a stupid idea it just leaves you messed up in the end that's why there's such a high divorce rate.

But even though that's always been my opinion about it, I find myself wanting .... To have a relationship with her with Lynn.