Never Been

Chapter 33

ANGELE

Panicking inside my room, I was restless. I didn't know what to do. Oh life! Why did you do this to me? Why did fate has to show that damn page to Seth?! Why!?

Okay, relax Angele. Relax. Breathe in, breathe out. Breathe in- sh!t!

I tried to think of a great solution, but I can't. The thought of Seth reading my dirty thoughts was very painful and embarrassing. How can I face him?

Hastily, I grabbed my phone to call Sandi- Sandi who's always there to help me, a psych major who can help my Sethsanity.

After several ringing,
"Sandi! Oh my god! Oh no!" I said with a hint of crying
"What? Wait! Calm down please. Calm down" I did as she told
"Okay. Seth found out about my Virgin Journal"
"You've written him down there?"
"Ahuh"
"Lemme hear it then,"
"Wait! What?" Fvck! I can't!
"Let me" I have no choice I'm in desperate situation

I read my article for her-- with strong trace of shame and embarrassment with each words and letters spoken.

"What the- Angele?"
"Please...Just help me" I begged her
"Well, uhm- just act innocently. Like you haven't read what he had written"
"What if I gave in? You know me. I'm not good at this"
"Well- just try you know. If you gave in then just let the adrenaline work"

I hung up the phone after we exchanged goodbyes. Yeah, I think Sandi's plan will work. I just hope I can pull it off perfectly.

My phone suddenly lit up and I literally jumped off of my feet,

We'll be bck there after 3 hrs. We'll go to d dctr
-Seth

Holy Seth! Doctor?!

Doctor?! What doctor?!
-Me

To hav u cheked up
-Seth

Check-up? What if they discover about my real condition?

Ok. I'll get redi
-Me

When I was 2 years old, I was very fond of eating grapes. One Christmas eve, at the same age, I ate a basket of grapes. The next week I caught severe laryngeal infection. A month passed by, I acquired Pneumonia. Several months walked away, I had Rheumatic Heart Disease.

My heart has been greatly affected. Up until now, I suffer the disease. I wasn't allowed to participate in school sports and I am not permitted to be in deep emotional state and to strain myself. There are lots of other exceptions, which made me the person I am today.

I definitely didn't want Seth to know about this. I hadn't even written this to my health profile. If he'll know about this, he will also give me limitations. I don't like that. I want him to treat me for who I am and not for whom I cannot be. I don't want him to see me with limitations. And not just him, but everyone.

*****

After I finished my relaxing bath, I dressed up myself with some pull-over hoody, perfectly fitted jeans and added up my black socks. My hair in a bun with my eyeglasses and retainers on.

Ding dong

The doorbell rang and I headed up to open it. Seth, I know this is him. Prepare, Angele! Act innocently like you've read nothing. None at all.

With all ease, I swung the door open and saw the virility of the features that surprised me. Seth changed his clothes. He's now wearing some fitted black long- sleeves shirt and faded jeans-his hair in unexplainably picturesque mess, his lips curled up while his cheeks puffed.