If He's Happy, I'm Happy; Maybe.

Light Shows

I couldn't believe him. All I wanted to do was help him and he shut me out again. I slammed the door behind me and started to walk quickly down the stairs. I was a few steps down when I heard a sob come from the room I had just left. I paused and turned back around. "John." The cry was quiet, not a call to me, just a cry of pain. I ran back up to the room and threw open the door.

What I saw broke my heart. He was sobbing. He didn't cry, our entire friendship I had never seen a single tear.

Why do I keep saying that. Sherlock is human he could cry.

I walked forward and set a hand on his shoulder. Sherlock looked up at me with pain in his eyes that I had only experienced one other time. My mind flashed back to that day two years ago, and I felt a tear on my cheek. I had lost him once, I didn't want to again. I wrapped my arms around his shoulders and he sobbed into my shoulder.

"It's okay Sherlock."

"No, you're mad at me." He sounded like a little boy.

I smiled and shook my head. "No I'm just worried about you."

Sherlock nodded, but the sobs wouldn't stop. His grip on my jumper didn't relax even after a couple minutes. I sighed and ran a finger through his black curls, smiling when the ends curled around my fingers. Sherlock finally stopped crying and looked up at me. I wiped away his tears and gave him a small smile.

"Please Sherlock what is wrong?"

Sherlock's gaze grew so intense that I had to look away. The thoughts running through my head were stupid.

He doesn't love me, why would the brilliant Sherlock Holmes love me.

"John..." He stopped and looked behind us.

I turned my head and saw Mary starring at us with a confused look.

"John is everything all right?"

I nodded and turned back to Sherlock, but he wasn't looking at me. I saw pain etched into every part of his face and I placed a hand on his shoulder. He looked back at me and nodded.

"Yes everything is perfectly fine. Nothing is wrong, everyone is happy." Sherlock whispered.

I wasn't sure if he was talking to himself or me. "Are you happy Sherlock?"

He looked at me and actually smiled. "I am if you are." He stood up and walked to his room.

I watched him go before turning to Mary. She walked forward and took my hand.

"He loves you." She whispered into my ear. "And you love him, don't lose him again."

She placed a kiss on my cheek and left the flat. I sat down in my chair and looked around the small living room.

Does he really love me? Why would he love me, there are so many other people out there that are way more deserving. No he can't love me.

I sighed and stood up, there was only one way to find the truth. I looked up at the clock and realized that I had been sitting there for almost two hours. I rushed to Sherlock's room and opened the door. He was just sitting on the bed staring at a small picture in his hand.