Flying to Neverland

Chapter 18: Fireflies

  Lily's POV:

I stood there frozen. My heart felt like it was torn between two decisions. To be happy a guy loves me so much, or to be angry that it's the only reason he's kept me here?

        "Ash....I love you too. So much, and these four weeks have indeed been the best of my life. But if the only reason I'm still here and causing my family pain is just because you can't trust me enough to let go, then....well I might as well die here!!" I said. I turned on my heel and walked out of his cabin, slamming the door behind me.

***

I lay in my cabin bed, crying. How badly I wanted to go home, but how badly I wanted to stay here. I loved Ash dearly. I now realized that. Without him here, I'd be miserable. But it was him that's been keeping me smiling these weeks. Him that's shown me compassion and love despite my scars. Which way should I go?

My door opened and James walked in. He didn't say anything obviously, since he was a mute. His throat got severely damaged in the fire and that's what caused him to die. I didn't like to think about it too much.

He sat down near where I was laying, and he started petting my hair, as if I were a dog or something. Despite the oddness of the gesture, I was soothed by it. I eventually stopped crying and relaxed enough to start to fall asleep. But before I did, I sat up and leaned into James. I liked hanging around him too because he was there when you needed to be.

        "If I leave, I might just miss you most of all." I whispered into his shirt. He wrapped his arms around me, nodding as if to say "i'll miss you the most too".

***

The next night, I sat outside my cabin on the grass, laying down and staring up at the billion star filled sky. It was amazing. I breathed in deeply, feeling tranquil. James's visit seemed to clear my head a little. He left a note advising to leave people alone for a day and get in touch with nature to relax. So that's what I did.

And now I felt amazing.

As I stared up at the sky, yellow dots floated above me. I frowned, puzzled. I sat up, and another blinking yellow dot came towards me. I opened my palm out for it to land on, and when it did, I stared at it then smiled.

It was a firefly.

Me and Trace would always spend hours catching these when we were little. I could never bring myself to keep them in the jar though. They looked so happy flying around.

I got up and gasped as a hundred fireflies flew around in a slow hypnotic rhythm. A cool, soft wind blew over me, making the grass move beneath my feet and the hem of my skirt ruffle in the soft wind.

        "Lily?" Ash asked. I looked over to where he was standing. I tried to steady the flow of emotions running back through me.

        "Yes Ash?" I asked, trying to keep my voice calm.

He came towards me, holding a small, glowing purple orb in his hand, no bigger than a marble.

        "I'm ready to let you go." He said. 

        "Wha-?" I started but he put a finger to my mouth.

        "Let me finish. I was selfish for trying to keep you all to myself when you and your family on earth were suffering from being kept apart from each other. The gang know about you leaving, and send their love. But at least let me warn you, you will be in pain. I wasn't trying to scare you." He said. I nodded.

        "Thankyou....Ash.  But what made you change your mind?" I asked. He shrugged.

        "I don't know. I felt as if I needed to." he said, scratching his arm where a firefly had landed on it.

        "Hey, what do those tattoos mean anyway?" I asked, pointing to them.

        "The higher you fly the harder you fall." Ash intoned sadly. I nodded. He sighed.

        "They have something to do with how I got here. Let's just say I pushed too much, not knowing to when to let go, and the situation got the better of me." He said. I frowned puzzled.

        "But hey, enough of that. All you have to do is hold the orb close to your heart and say I want to go home. It will take you back home. You won't be able to visit unless you somehow happen to be in another coma, or die of unnatural causings in your teen years." He said. I nodded.

He took my hand and gently placed the orb in it, closing my fingers around it.

He then kissed my hand, then every scar on my arms.

Tears formed in my eyes.

        "I love you Ash love. So much. So much it hurts. You have no idea how torn I am." I said. He looked into my eyes, his eyes full of pain and love.

        "I do actually. Goodbye Lilian Rose Everlasting. I wish to you a good life." He said.

He grabbed my face and kissed me, hard, and I threw my arms around him kissing him back, trying not to cry.

We finally let go and I held the orb close to my heart as I said, and stared straight into his eyes as I whispered,

        "I want to go home."

I got one last full look at him before I blacked out, feeling myself disappear.