Dear you

Dear you, part 1

Dear you,

A stranger picked me up down the street from my house, and we traced each others lips with our own underneath the moonlight.

We talked about music, people and love. I told him that you left me for another girl, made me feel like I'll never be good enough. He looked at me and said "You have to think about it as him being not good enough for you, not the other way around,because he wasn't." I wanted to shout so badly but, He was. He was more than enough. I just didn't know how to love him. I wanted to say that but instead I just smiled and hid my face further in the crease of his chest.

He took my shaking arm and kissed it just like you used to. Right down the center of my arm, where my scars were. I almost cried, but I kept myself together. I couldn't stop thinking about the way you kissed them. You tried to heal all of my scars with your kisses, and it worked it always worked. But when he kissed me the way you used to, I felt dizzy. I was so dizzy, I got sick. I almost jumped out of the back of his car and threw up all over the streets.

We talked about this, about one night stands, so we could be on the same page. He looked at me and said calmly "I don't want to hurt you." I couldn't speak because I thought it would sound bad if I said "You'll never hurt me, I won't let you." I just kept quiet. Maybe silence wasn't the best, but I couldn't manage anything else.

The moon was bright. It was so bright, it eliminated his face. He's so handsome, but he's not you. So I look at the moon instead and tell him how beautiful it is, how I would write about it if I could. He asked me what would I say and I told him I would just compare it to people, but I forgot to mention the so called people were you. You're the moon, the stars, the Galaxy and beyond, but I won't tell him that. I let him stroke my face some more and listened to him tell me how beautiful I am. I disagreed, but I never said anything. I heard him but I didn't listen.

I laid on his chest and felt yours. I heard his heartbeat and it sounded like yours. I felt his lips and felt yours. I should probably stop doing this....