Dreams of the Past

Pack

Chapter 38

Pack

They had just finished their morning katas. Kakashi was running through an easy taijutsu drill with an eager Tenzō, and Sakura decided that she wanted to fight. She wanted to throw everything she had into a proper spar against someone new.

Three weeks ago, a flood of enemies had poured into her home and gotten the better of her, hurt her, killed her baby, and taken her boys and herself away.

She hadn't been strong enough.

The strongest kunoichi of her generation, but she couldn't protect her own children.

She would have to be stronger, and today, she finally felt ready to start working towards that goal.

"Mebae?"

The other woman looked up from where she'd been watching Kakashi and Tenzō. "Yes, Ayame-sama?"

Sakura huffed, as uncomfortable with the deference as Kakashi was. 'You're the matriarch of our clan, it's due respect. It's how I was raised.' Maybe if they were a very large clan it would be more important to Sakura. As it was, it felt overly formal from an older woman that would hopefully be a friend. Mebae had seen her at her very worst, helped to rescue them, she was family. "Mebae, please, I told you, Ayame is fine."

She smiled apologetically, pulling her thick braid over her shoulder. "I'm sorry, Ayame."

Sakura relaxed, folding her arms across her waist. "I was wondering if you would like to spar?"

Her bright blue eyes lit up and she smiled wider. "I'd love to!" She started to stand but froze, eyes sliding to Kakashi. "I won't hurt her, Karasu-sama."

Shoulders sagging, Sakura looked at her husband. He was still focusing on Tenzō, yet she could see that he was tense. He had been overprotective, hovering, but she did not blame him. A small sigh passed through his mask and his eyes creased in a smile. "I know that, Mebae." He looked at her and the tightness around his eyes softened. "But you don't have to hold back for her, she can handle it."

A faint smile on her lips, Sakura beckoned Mebae to follow her as she headed out.

As they walked towards the field, Mebae watched her from the corner of her eyes. "Karasu-sama said you were the strongest kunoichi of your generation."

The past tense chaffed. She knew that wasn't how he'd meant it, but it's how she felt. "I've spent the last year at home. Sure, I've trained as much as I ever have, but I haven't gone on missions, faced actual enemies. When I did, when it mattered, I failed. I don't know if I deserve that title anymore."

Mebae put her hand on her arm, pulling her to a stop. "Ayame, you were essentially alone, facing more than thirty Jōnin-level enemies at once, ambushed in your bed, fighting them in such a confined space while trying to protect your pups. Having Tenzō at your feet and the pup you were carrying severely restricted how you could fight back. It wasn't a fair fight, and I can't think of anyone who would have done better than you."

Sakura frowned down at the ground, her vision blurred. Kakashi had said almost the same thing to her when Tenzō had woken up with another nightmare a week before. They'd gotten him settled, but she had broken down and blamed herself again. "Yeah... I know you're right but..."

"It stole the confidence you had in your abilities, in your strength."

Dabbing at the corners of her eyes, Sakura nodded. "Yeah, that's..." She cleared her throat. "I wasn't always the strongest, I started out pretty useless actually. I had to work so hard, for years to even feel like I deserved to stand on the same field as my teammates. Knowing that he has confidence in me means more than I can say, but I need to believe it again for myself."