I remember that night like no other
The way everyone acted when they found out
How they were so frantic running around with their minds going 90 to nothing and not letting reality set it because they knew they would shut down and end up in a puddle of their own tears.
I've been sleeping in your bed ever since everything happened, thoughts of you run through my mind reminiscing on the thought of seeing you lying in the exact spot I sleep in, except their was blood, a puddle of the same blood that I had in me
I remember cleaning the dried up blood with a wet paper towel off of your left hand that had been sitting in the blood for more than an hour and a half because I guess nobody else had the urge to do what I done.
I remember them taking you out of the house in a body bag
Making me cringe at the sight because you left so soon
you left us feeling empty, but with a side of joy because we knew you weren't suffering anymore and that you were finally happy with where your at now.
The same morning they took you in a body bag,
I went up to the house to get a few minutes of shut eye because I knew that nana would need me for awhile while she let it sink in.
I remember sleeping in my bed that same morning a few hours after everything had happened, and how I would jump up out of bed at every little noise because I thought it was a nightmare and my body was soon to wake up because it was the worst night of my life and I thought that if I just went back to sleep everything would be okay because you left so unexpectedly but I guess sleep doesn't make everything better.
Sunday, one day after you left us, I remember going to the funeral home to see you one more time before your body was cremated and turned to dust.
Everyone walked in except for me and a few others, it wasn't a minute later they walked out of the room after seeing you
I remember nana saying how beautiful you looked because you looked peaceful.
I refused to see you that way even though I needed to say goodbye one more time.
I walked in the room with Rodney after a few people asked me if I wanted to go with them but I refused and went with Rodney
I saw your body lying there with no chemicals added since you would be cremated
Just lying there on the cold metal table, almost seeming asleep,
But we all knew you weren't asleep
And this all seems like one big dream, and your just on a long vacation out of town. Joy Riding that harley of yours that you loved oh so much.
I don't know how long I can handle the thought of you being gone until I break down again.
It's already been a week, but to me it feels like an eternity without you.
I remember taking a cold shower yesterday, because the last time I felt your skin you were ice cold,
And you didn't have that warmth radiating off of you anymore.
Cold showers make me think a lot about the last time I saw you, I feel at peace when I take cold showers since you've been gone.
I know I need to calm down because everything's going to be okay, but how am I suppose to calm down when all I can think about is you, and how you left so soon?
(BNR)
