There was a knock at the door. I had to open it at some point but I wanted to stay in my room and be upset and heart broken all day. It was him. I yelled come in and it was him. It was the guy who cheated on me. Are you joking how dare he come and talk to me after what had happened but I didn't say a word and neither did Alex. He just sat there looking at the floor. I wondered if he would talk or ask me if I was ok but I didn't want to talk to him. I hated him. He cheated on me with his "cousin." He didn't even admit to it or anything.
"Are you ok?" Alex said.
Fuck he actually sounded worried. Was he actually worried about me or was he just fucking with me again. I couldn't tell so I just laid there silently. Not whispering. Not speaking. Not moving.
He looked up at me and I was caught looking at him and he really looker scared for me.
"Amber are you ok, I'm scared and I'm sorry for what I did to u it was a stupid mistake and I wasn't thinking. I love u and only u. I only loved u in my life and can't imagine my life without u. Please please forgive me or say something."
Did he really just do that? Did he really just say all the things I wanted to hear?? I loved that but my heart is shattered into a million pieces.
" I.. I.. I don't know what to say." I mumbled. I really wanted him to hold me in his arms but giving in again, I couldn't do that, could I?
If I really could take him into my arms would I really do that? My heart is broken and I don't think it can be fixed.
"Can we please talk about this? Please I want you back. Please baby I need you in my life not Lilly. I love you with all my heart." Alex said.
Why does he keep doing this. Why does he keep messing with me and why can't he leave me alone. I don't love him. Or at least I don't think I do.
" I can't do this anymore Alex. Please just leave I don't love you broke my heart and I don't think I can trust you anymore." I yelled because I couldn't do this. I couldn't take it anymore being in the same room as him.
I thought I loved him. Maybe I should start way at the beginning so I don't confuse you or anything. It was the summer before grade 9.
