Will broken hearts find their way back to each other?

30

Lucy's POV:

"Calm down it was nothing, okay?" Hazel bites back.

I step closer, our bodies almost touching our breaths ragged and heavy.

"It's not nothing to me. What the fuck did you mean by that." I push harder on her shoulders.

She stares at me blankly clearly not wanting to answer me. I don't have time for this.

"I SAID ANSWER ME!" I shout, my temper getting the better of me.

"It's not my place to say. Talk to your fucking girlfriend."

"I don't have a girlfriend?"

"Ona??"  I ask in confusion.

"Just talk to her." She replies.

"FUCK" I shout. I let go of her and storm out of the bathroom.

You've got to be kidding me. I still don't get who this 'Hazel' girl is, and now she's bringing drugs into it.

My mind scrambles and my vision becomes foggy. It was going decent before she came along.

Should I get Keira or do I keep this to myself? I don't want to drag her into my stuff. We are okay at the minute. What if this takes her down with me? I don't know. It's all too much.

I jog back to the room, forgetting about dinner. I don't have an appetite anymore. I can't eat, I can't stop thinking about her words.

'I wish you would just take those drugs. You were so much better on them.' Is what plays through my mind over and over again as I let the water from the shower drip down onto my body.

I've never taken drugs before? And I've never met her, so how does this make sense?

Is it a connection through Ona? Well.. obviously it is but it still doesn't make sense. We get drug tested a lot, I couldn't risk my career like that. Throw it down the drain just for a bit of enjoyment.

I apply my skincare and get changed into something more comfortable. My stomach growls with hunger, but I can't give in. I need to starve away my thoughts. Starve away my pain.

I try so hard to recall the night of the party. Just anything, a hint of hope, but nothing arrives. It's just a hazy cloud of darkness. I just want answers. I want to know why I cheated on Keira, I wanted to know if I took these 'so called drugs.'

My feet carry me before my brain can register it and I'm already heading out of the room.

Was it just me being drunk that caused me to cheat? Fuck I hate that word. I'm ashamed to say I did that. I don't even know myself anymore. Apparently I was doing it before the party but I don't remember it. I don't remember che- I don't remember getting with someone else whilst with the love of my life.

I wanted a family with her for goodness sake. Mini me's and mini her's running around our dream house not a care in the world. I wanted to be married and mostly just happy. But I fucked it up. And I might have fucked up my only chance all for some pleasure.

I don't think I will ever be able to come to terms with what I've done, or be able to forgive myself. I won't ever blame Keira if she doesn't. Never in a million years.

Before more thoughts arise, I collide with a body.

"You alright bronze?" Mary asks.

"Huh- what?" I reply confused.

"I just saw you talking to yourself." She eyes my face. "You're dripping with sweat."

I drag my fingers across my forehead, instantly being met with the damp droplets of sweat.