Saturday, October 2nd 1875
Cornwall, England
Dear diary,
This will probably take a while to explain. Maybe, I don't know for sure. Today I got to know why my parents hate me and only me. Don't ask me how, it just happened.
The family Poldark is a wealthy and proud family. They are respected by almost everyone and loved by some of the working classes. But these last years the people's respect went down hills for them.
Charles Poldark decided that his daughter, Verity Poldark, should marry someone of the lower classes, so that the people would respect them again like they used to do. They searched and found out that mother was expecting a baby, me. Mother and Father assured the Poldarks that the baby was a boy. Hell, they were wrong. Verity and I have a 2 years difference, so that meant that by the time I was born, she would be 2 years old. It was planned to have our marriage at the time I would turn 20.
Our marriage was supposed to be beneficial for both families. The Poldarks were going to be loved by more people, and being loved means more capital. My family would get a part of the capital and they wouldn't have to work as hard as they do now and they could live in a better environment.
But the day I was born, was a sad day. It appeared that I was a girl, so no marriage. The family Poldark hasn't talked to us since, as if they had a reason to. Mother hated me. Father hated me. Good to know that. They could have killed me that moment, but they didn't, for some reason. Since then they treat me like trash. I kind of understand them, but I want them to stop it!
Why can't they just treat me the way they treat Thomas or Ross?! Why won't they show a bit of love? I'm sick of it. I used to try to please them in a lot of ways when I was younger, till I turned 15, that was the year I realised that whatever I did, it would never change their thoughts on me. I just want to be loved by my parents, even if it was just for one day. One day, not getting blamed for everything I do, one day without getting slapped or kicked because I used salt, one day not being scolded at as a dumbass. But of course that will never happen. They will always believe that I am a hopeless piece of shit.
I got to know of all of this after I came from the factory where Isaac let me work an hour extra because he believed I didn't work hard enough. How the bloody hell could someone do all that work on his or her own? But I managed, and when I was done, I saw Elijah waiting for me, which was very kind. We talked a bit on the road back about some random things and departed to go home. Mother got mad at me because I came late and then we had a bit of a fight and suddenly that whole, the story came out of her mouth. She then sent me to the 'sleeping corner' without supper. I thought I could handle it, but I can't.
I'm going to stop here and sleep, to forget my hunger.
Sincerely,
Demelza Watson
