Paradigm Shift

A reason for everything

* * *
Jasmine

I stepped outside and slowly made my way towards the forest clearing. As I got closer, I could see Seth sitting by the edge of the stream. 

"Penny for them" 

I know he heard me, but he didn't react. I had never seen him like this. He looked so deep in thought, but as I sat down next to him, I could see sadness in his features. 

"Do you want to be alone?" I asked.

He shook his head, but I moved to lie in the forest clearing. At midday, the sun shone down through the trees and the leafs provided the perfect amount of protection. I could lay there and feel the sun on my skin without it being uncomfortable.

I heard Seth closer and he let out a sigh as he led beside me. "I don't mean to be selfish."

I suddenly felt bad even though it was Roman that had said that about him. "You heard that?" 

"I did" Seth confirmed. "He's right though...I am selfish, but he doesn't know why. He just thinks I'm a brat." 

I turned to face him

"Growing up, I was happy until my dad left, then a sadness settled in me. My mother gave me everything I wanted and I have a great step father but deep down that sadness, it never went away. Wrestling provided me with a distraction, and my new focus became building a legacy. I prioritised myself, made sure I was happy by putting my own needs before everyone else's, but by doing that I became selfish. Then my leg gave out on me and it hit me again. That overwhelming sense of sadness." He sat up and I did the same. "After my leg gave out, I begged Dean to transform me but he refused...I did something pretty bad but at the time I was desperate"

He grew quiet 

"What did you do?" I encouraged 

"I stole his venom and injected it into my bloodstream" he confessed 

"Seth!-"

"There's more" Seth interrupted. "Not long after I returned to work, Roman's leukemia came back. I visited him and he was in a bad way...I...bit and transformation him"

I was shocked by what I was hearing, but I was also glad that Seth was opening up to me.

"I may be selfish and a brat but underneath it all I'm just the same scared little boy I was all those years ago...just trying to be happy anyway I can. Seeing Dean mope about annoys me because he doesn't realise just how lucky he is to be immortal. He doesn't know a good thing when he has it. When he met you, he was finally happy again. Then he goes and spoils it all by breaking your bond." 

"I don't like what he's done, but he did it for me. He wanted me to have a choice." 

"He did it because he's an idiot." Seth argued "He could have just spoken to you about it. He didn't need to cause you all that unnecessary pain." 

"Everyone deals with things differently" I pointed out 

Seth looked shocked. "Are you seriously defending him!?"

"I can't help it. I love him" I answered 

Seth shook his head in disbelief and let out a dramatic sigh. "He'll come back soon enough with his tail between his legs." 

"What?"

"Dean. He'll come back soon" Seth continued. "I've seen it." 

"When?" I asked

"I'm not sure. It's hard to tell" Seth explained. "I suppose he's waiting until the bond breaks completely." 

From the way I had been feeling, I would guess the bond was breaking already. The continual pull from the invisible rope snapped occasionally and the frequency of the breaks were increasing by the day. 

"So you and Roman...are you" *Seth made a sexual gesture with his hands.*

"I got out of the hospital today Seth" I reminded him 

"Something's going on between the two of you" Seth added

"I don't know...I...am attracted to Roman but I love Dean"

"But you and Dean were never in a relationship" Seth pointed out. "So, what's the problem?" 

"I feel like I would be betraying Dean by even thinking about being with Roman?" I explained 

"Why? Because you're bonded?" Seth answered "Stop worrying so much...have some fun...get laid!"

"SETH!!"

"Seriously, Roman hasn't even touched a woman since he became a vampire. Put the poor guy out of his misery already." 

"But what happens when Dean comes back?" I asked 

Seth stood to his feet. "I don't know. Why are you asking me?." 

"Thanks a lot" I mumbled sarcastically as he walked away

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

[A few days later]

Roman and I were packing up my belongings from my apartment. He was standing beside me, placing any non expired food into a box ready for donation.

"This omnivore diet. How does it work exactly?" I asked "because Seth said that food tastes wrong once it's cooked, but pretty much everything is cooked to some extent." 

"Seth was exaggerating. Not all food tastes wrong once it's cooked" Roman explained. "It's all to do with personal preference."

My earlier conversation with Seth was playing heavy on my mind as I looked around my apartment, making sure I had left nothing unpacked. 

"Are you okay?" Roman asked 

"Can I be honest with you about something?" 

"Of course" he answered 

"I want to see if we...could...have something but...when Dean comes back, I might..."

"Wait, a second. What do you mean when Dean comes back?" Roman asked.

"Seth told me that Dean is going to come back" I explained 

"When?" Roman asked

"He doesn't know" 

"And you're worried that when he returns you'll forget all about what we had?" Roman guessed.

I nodded. "I really care about you...but his venom transformed me and because of that we are always going to be drawn to one another weather our bond is broken or not"

He wrapped his arms around me, and I leaned into him.

"Look at me" he whispered 

I looked up at him, and he leant forward and kissed me. It was passionate and full of promise of what was to come. He lifted me onto the counter and I wrapped my legs around him. He pulled back, and I groaned, not ready for the kiss to end 

"If what we have ends as soon as Dean comes back, then I intend to fight for you." Roman promised. "He had his chance, and he blew it. You deserve better."

If I could still blush, I probably would have

"So" Roman continued "What do you think?. Should we give it a go?" 

I smiled at him. "You say that like I have a choice. I couldn't resist you even if I tried you sexy bastard!." 

He laughed and lifted me up with ease, carrying me towards the bedroom.