Hallways
Hallways
Hallways
And I turn a corner
And there you stand
I know you saw me
And I know I saw you
And in that literal second I was absolutely terrified
You looked at me for half a second but that was enough to make me shake
But it wasn't just then, no
Lunch room
You watched me
I walked past you to take my tray, and I know you saw me
And I know I saw you
And I honestly wish I hadn't.
And I avert my eyes and I avert my attention to someone else, anyone else
I avert my anxiety to my phone and the person I miss most
I avert my anxiety to a thought,
"Does it really matter ?"
And truth is, it doesn't.
Hallways
Hallways
Hallways
I see you again
I walk past without second thought
Because I remember so clearly I used to only be looking at you. I remember my eyes never left you because I thought you were real.
But now my eyes face forward. I have somewhere to be this summer. I have to focus on money, on food, on packing, I have to focus on them.
And I have to focus in on not your eyes, no, but theirs.
Soft green eyes with hazel brown around the pupil.
Soft.
I focus on the softness and I focus not on you, but on my future.
So no, I will not look back at you. I will look forward and stare into the space that doesn't exist quite yet atleast.
I will stare at the sky hoping that they're looking at it too
I will not look back at you the way you looked at me
And what made me laugh, was that you looked scared too.
And I thought to myself,
"Good.
You should be."
Because I am new.
And I do not need anyone like you.
I've got hope.
And they may be far away, but that doesn't matter because distance doesn't equal worth.
I have hope.
And I won't bleed over you anymore.
And one day I won't flinch when I hear your name.
That day, im betting, will be this year sometime
I won't flinch when someone touches me.
I won't flinch. I won't bat an eyelash.
I will be stronger than you.
You're just a drop of blood in an endless ocean of hope and heart.
And you're dead to me.
