Thoughts Of The Author

31/7/15 - Friends

Two years of secondary school, two weeks into summer break and the only people I see regularly are ones I haven't had lessons with since primary school.

After two years I have no solid connection with anyone in my secondary school. Out of everyone I've befriended, three of them have attempted suicide at least twice, two people attempting in the space of a week-long school break earlier in the year.

Another of my friends got so fed up of our school that she moved to a different school in April to get away from everyone.

The other two of my six friends are ones I rarely talk to outside of school and they keep to themselves, not really friends with the other people I know.

And all of my friends fall out all the time. I will be gone for a day or two and when I come back it's almost like a civil war has happened on a miniature scale. I never know what's going on because nobody ever seems to trust me or care about my opinion.

And if any of these friends with Wattpad accounts are reading this, I don't care if you say that you do care. I'm tired of picking up the pieces of broken friendships and still being the friend nobody cares about.

Maybe the only reason I've held onto some of these friends is because I spent half a year alone at my school and I'm afraid of being alone again. That's probably something I can work on; being less fearful of loneliness.

In case nobody has picked up on what's going on here, I've basically made a diary I'm willing to share with people on the internet. I really don't care who reads this and takes an interest, it's just a way to tell people stuff so it's not weighing down my mind all the time.