The happiest place on Earth

Untitled Part 1

"Can you tell me where to find the church?" I asked the black shadowed figure a few paces ahead of me. When it got closer I noticed that it was a white rabbit. He was a timid creature, in his tiny little suit, holding his stopwatch.

I began to see that he was a protagonist on my journey, and I felt as though these words could be something I would find flowing upon the pages of my grandmother's diary. I knew his antagonist was around somewhere, but I don't think I wanted to face him either. He had blood shot eyes, and was trembling in fear.

"Mr. Rabbit" I asked "what are you afraid of?"

To which he told me that I would soon see.

Then Rabbit then asked me one simple thing

"Tell me about your life pretty girl. Tell me everything about your journey."

As we walked through the woods, I realized that I didn't know what to tell him. I decided to begin the tale from the depths of my twisted mind.

"Well that depends really, I mean there isn't much that which remains of my sanity Rabbit." I played nervously with the antique key that I wore around my neck, the key to all my secrets I like to think.

"Well I'm looking for the church my grandmother was married in, because she said she would meet me there. She has her diary for me, an antique looking book, and it's going to hold the tale of my life.

He looked at me funny, so I began

"I wasn't always as broken and twisted as I seem, but then again we don't start off this way do we?

Growing up in a small town I was pretty normal. I lived the silly girl life, but I loved sports and cross-country. I loved dancing, smiling, and being popular in school. I wasn't the nicest girl I can admit that, and I had opportunities to be a model. I was able to see the world ahead of me, in the palm of my hands.

Then the incident happened changing who I was forever.

There was a boy who was a trusted family friend and everything was fine until he was drunk. It was New Years Eve, and he attacked me. He did the most unspeakable things to me in one evening. Every time I thought it was over, it began again, and no one heard my cries except God, who I begged to make it stop. God failed to answer every time; yet I held on crawling to the bathroom, beaten, and covered in my own blood. When I locked myself behind the door, THAT'S when God stepped in; after I needed him the most as it usually seems to be. I even held on after that sad excuse for a human being couldn't live with the guilt so he killed himself after, even when I held him as he overdosed on pills telling him that I forgave him. Watching him die in my arms sent me into a complete mental breakdown. I lost it, but somehow I managed to look through a keyhole in my mind, where I saw a light with green pastures. There was always hope in those pastures.

"It was those pastures that got you through wasn't it?" The white rabbit asked me, smirking, with a stop watch in its furry paw, while dressed to the nines with almost no place he seemed to want to go.

"Rabbit, though everything in my nightmare of days. There were dreams of him every night. My parents woke up to many nights of me screaming and crying while in my sleep. I made night trips to kitchen with knives to make sure I could ward off the fear but I felt as though he was still there. It helped me but tore my family apart.

I wasn't sure for the simple fact that I wanted nothing more than the escape of being. March came and I met a military boy, who was both sweet and charming. He spoke beautiful promises, wrote me beautiful love letters, and I lost my consensual virginity. When he left for AIT he left me that April, my abandonment issues kicked into gear."