(Dirk-chan is laying down on the couch and reader-chan is sitting on top of him.)
You took off dirks shades, and he quickly shoved them into your face, making sure his eye-color wasn't seen. "Awwwww... Dirk! You're no fun! I can't see anything!" You feel around his face and he grabs your wrists, trying to stop you. "Good." He says in his stoic yet sexy voice. "I'm your girlfriend, don't you trust me?" You pout. "No, not really." He says, with a small laugh at the end of the sentence. You trace the shape of dirks shades on your face. "Ah, yes. The scalene triangle." You say, stroking your chin.
"What?"
"I like these scalene triangle shades."
"What the f*ck, those are anime shades."
"Yes, but also scalene triangle shades."
"That doesn't even make any sense."
"Good."
"Tch, give me those..."
You feel the scalene triangle shades be taken off of your face, and for the split second they were off, you saw a vibrant orange shine in your boyfriends eyes. "WHOA!!!" You suddenly tacklepounce dirk and throw his shades off of his face. His eyes widen for a moment, but then they shut tight again. "CMON DIRK SHOW ME THOSE EYES I ALREADY SAW THEM!" You scream in his face. "I can't be seen without my glasses!" You quickly grab them from the hardwood floor of your home and throw them onto a completely different couch than you and dirk were on. "THOSE SCALENE TRIANGLE SHADES ARE GOING THO HAVE TO WAIT LET ME SEE THEM PEARLY WHITES."
"(F/n), your pearly whites are your teeth."
"BE QUIET YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN!!" You grab dirks wrists, take off your thin-chain necklace, and tie his hand behind his back with it. Now you just have to get his eyes open... "(F/n), you piece of sh*t!!" He struggles to untie the necklace and you laugh evily. You know exactly how to get his eyes open. "Look, puppet porn!" And then his eyes shoot open. "WHERE???" You laugh hystaricaly, making sure that it looks like your eyes are shut tight, but they aren't. You are squinting just enough so you can see the tropical orange color of dirk strider's eyes. "(F/n), I know your eyes are open." Dirk groans, lifting your eyelids. "Fine, you caught me red-handed. What now,
Strider?"
"I don't know, (l/n), why don't you decide?"
"Can I take a picture?"
"No."
"Selfie?"
"That's the same thing."
"Pleaaase~~~"
"No."
"Wait a second.... Is that...?"
"Is what what?"
"PFFFFFFFHAHAHAHAHAHAAAA!! IT IS!!!!"
"What?!?!"
You had just realized that dirk had a farmers tan on his face that took the shape of his anime shades. "YOU HAVE A SCALENE TRIANGLE FARMERS TAN!!!!"
"Damn it, (f/n)!!"
"AH YES, THE SCALENE TRIANGLE!!"
"Ugh! Where did you put my shades?"
"OH NO NOT THE SCALENE TRIANGLE!!"
"Ah yeS, THE SCALENE TRIANGLE NOW WHERE ARE MY SHADES?"
Dirk threw you off of his lap once he spotted the shades and he left you on the floor half-crying half-laughing while he got some orange soda from the fridge.
"I don't think I like the scalene triangle very much anymore." You say.
"Why not?" Dirk questions, siping from his cup of fanta.
"They hide my boyfriends beautiful eyes~"
*cue dirks blush*
