Hello, my name is Evilynn. What I'm about to tell you is a true story. Honestly, really, true. If you don't believe me, well, that's okay too...
Alexis was a strange girl who had some strange fears. She was scared of discovering severed butts (dripping with blood) in her basement, scared of the banshee's screamsound the trees made when the wind was exceptionally strong, but most of all, she was scared of being buried alive.
All her life, Alexis had only two friends:Heaven (who lived right next door) and l
Lejerric (who lived across the street).Alexis was better friends with Heaven than Lejerric, mostly because Lejerric smelled like rotting feet. He smelled so strongly ofrotting feet that you could usually tell he was close by, even before you could see him. Plus, he liked to eat snakess, seriously.
Lejerric was mostly a loner and a trickster, and he knew all about Alexis's fears. He wanted to show her how ridiculous her fears were, so he devised this plan. It was a mostly evil, kinda sadistic plan, but he thought it would be funny.
Lejerric decided he would pretend to be dead. He would pretend to be dead, there would be a giant funeral for him, and the only person that would know he was pretending would be Alexis.
At the funeral, near the end, Lejerric would start to make noise and whoop and holler.Alexis would protest, and say, "Wait a minute, he's alive!"
lejerric would let it go so far as having the coffin dropped into the grave, and as they were shoveling the first mound of dirt, he would pop out of the coffin and yell, "Gotcha!" Everyone at the funeral, all his family and friends, would realize what was going on and they would all have a good laugh at Alexis's expense--what a silly fear to have.
The morning of Halloween, Alexis received a call from Lejerric's mother.
"I'm so sorry," she said, "but Lejerric was in a terrible accident. Honey, I'm calling to tell you that he's passed away."
Lejerric's mother broke into sobs and hung up the phone.
Alexis elt horrible as she placed the phone back on the receiver. She didn't like this trick at all.
The day of the funeral Heaven, her parents and Alexis's parents all attended. Everyone from the neighborhood was there, even the psychotic lady who lived alone in a big house with her cats.
Everyone except for Alexis. She had to stay home because she had a terrible case of laryngitis. She couldn't even speak to tell her mom it was all a trick. She tried to write a note, but she was too delirious and fell back asleep.
The funeral was beautiful. Members of Lejerric's family stood up to share stories and wonderful memories of him. Songs were sung. Everyone cried.
As the ceremony drew to a close, Lejerric became tired of pretending and started banging on the closed casket. He knewalexis would jump up and start to protest. Everyone would be so confused.
He didn't know that Alexis was not there. She was asleep in her bed, dreaming about being buried alive. No one else noticed his sounds. They were all so sad and lost in their own thoughts...
As the ceremony drew to a close, Lejerric became tired of pretending and started banging on the closed casket. He knew Alexis would jump up and start to protest. Everyone would be so confused.
He didn't know that Alexis was not there. She was asleep in her bed, dreaming about being buried alive. No one else noticed his sounds. They were all so sad and lost in their own thoughts...
The coffin was dropped slowly into the ground. Lejerric could hear the dirt dropping onto the top of the coffin. With each thud, thud, his body temperature rose slightly. He started sweating. He heard his mother crying out. He banged and slammed his body against the tiny walls of the coffin.
It was too late.
