Ruthless

Chapter 42

Shailene's Point of View

"Is he coming or no?" I ask my mother. She stands back up - she was getting my cardigan out of the suitcase she brought for me in the corner - and walks over to the side of my bed. 

"Shail calm down, he said he'd be here so he'll be here. He doesn't lie to you."

"Yes he does." I say back thinking of the morning after my party in February. He said he'd call me. And he didn't. I probably wouldn't have been so affected if we didn't have sex the night before. Instead he went back to Ruth and didn't bother to even tell me.

"He what?" My mother asks. She's standing with a hand on her hip, worry on her face.

"Never mind."

She looks like she's not convinced but obviously decides to let it go. "Here," she says handing me my cream cardigan.

Damn I missed this thing. I put it on quickly and as soon as I put my face against the sleeve, I smile. It smells like home, safety.

"Do you want anyth-" She's intercepted with a knock on the door.

I look up, the various cables still attached to my skinny arm, and I see him.

"Am I interrupting?" Theo asks in his charming British accent that I've become so used to. 

I want to say something but I don't know what. It feels as if I'm meeting him for the first time again. I feel like I need to make a good impression.

Only he already knows me. And deep down I know him too. 

"Wow...you're.." He begins and starts shaking his head.

"What?" I ask. My voice raspier than usual.

"...alive." He finally says.

I giggle and he laughs along.

My mother stands beside my bed, her gaze skipping from me to Theo, a smile on her face.

"I'm gonna leave you guys to it. I'll be down in the cafeteria, should probably call your dad and Tanner, Theo come down to get me when you're leaving. And call me if you need anything." She says and grabs her handbag on her way out.

Once she's gone, Theo stands at the foot of my bed not moving at all.

I decide to start the conversation. "So..uh..why are you wearing a suit?"

"I'm going to the TriBeCa Film Featival After this." He says.

Oh is that today? How long was I out for? I decide to leave that question for my doctor or mother.

He doesn't move, still. "Okay Theo look you're gonna have to sit down or something cause you're staring to freak me out."

He blushes a deep red and walks over to the side of my bed. He grabs my wire covered hand an presses a kiss to it. "For you," he says gesturing to the bouquet of freesias in his other hand.

There he goes again with his romantic treatment of me.

I decide to just keep quiet for now.

"You can just put them.." He's already putting them in the vase next to my bed.
"Yeah.."

He just sits on my bed and looks at my hand. Then he grabs it and holds it not saying anything, his eyes closed.

"I'm so sorry for everything. So sorry. But that note... Just don't ever say goodbye with a note. Do you have any idea how hard it was knowing that you might not wake up and knowing that the last though you had of me was of anger?"

His voice is getting louder but more soothing at the same time. It takes me a while to realise he's holding back tears.

"I need to say something. And just be quiet until I say it fully, okay?"

I nod.

He sits on the edge of my bed and he's slightly hovering over me. "I love you," he whispers. "I dont care if you don't want me. I don't care about any of those things.. I just want you to know,"

He takes a deep breath and a tear rolls down his cheek. Mine too. "I love you," he repeats.

And then I pull him close to me so I can feel safe in his embrace.
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Dun dun da dun!
I feel like my writing is getting shittier and shittier with every chapter.

Shout out to LauraPriorLynch for helping with this chapter. You know what you did!!!

Again get those comments back up to the hundreds or no posting for a while!

Goodnight my good people!