The Demise of Megan Dewtrop

8.Now I'm in on it

"Alicia?" I caught her arm after we had been buzzed out of the POD. The other inmates regarded me with an acrimonious curiosity before returning to their work. I didn't know where Megan had gone. I did see a few elbow nudges and whispers between them. But I really would have thought there would be more interest in an outsider.

The marginally older woman turned around, her face open and attentive. I was feeling warmer towards her barely in the space of an hour. I brought her gently to the side of the wide, bare corridor. My voice was low and concerned: "I was threatened, today, by another inmate." Her eyes widened. "Actually, it wasn't just me, it was Megan, too."

"Can you tell me who it is?"

"Well, it was recorded...." She bit her lip. I clicked the button:

Beep

The tinny voices blared from the tiny speaker.

-Hi, Laura.

A loud footstep

-I'm busy... And also it's not fair.

Another step.

-I need you to leave now....

Step

-Get the fuck up... The voice was obviously lower, a more mature quality.

-LAURA!.... You don't want to do this. Not with her there.

-I said, stand the FUCK UP!

-She knows about the button. You do anything and she'll press it.

The voices clicked off suddenly. The faint buzzing stopped.

"Laura, huh?" Her face darkened, she reached for the walky talky in her chest pocket. "This is Officer Lee.. can we have Laura Ruiz moved to solitary with immediate effect?"

"Thanks.."I whispered. I slipped the recorder back in my purse.

"You know she'll be in there for a week or so..." Alicia raised her eyebrows at me, still laced with concern.

"Just... do what you need to."

We turned and continued, click..click..click.. My stilettos against the floor.

"Are you Ok?" She didn't turn round as she spoke.

"Yeah..."

"Do you think you're ... Gonna come back?"

"Yeah.. I'm coming back." I became more sure of myself.

"Good."

"Yeah...."

There was the buzz that signified I'd been let back into reception. I looked forward to being in my car.

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There was something funny about this. Not laughable funny, or strange funny. It was a kind of off putting, bitter taste in your mouth funny. I couldn't quite tell what it was. But I really wanted to.

I was funny because I'd been told about Megan's charm, her shrewd little games that she likes to play. And at first I thought it was just with the adults, the guards and the psychiatrists. But no. It seemed like she played with everyone until she turned out top. And somehow, I was in on it too.

How had I let myself be manipulated like that.... I thought as I popped the boot of my car and pulled out a large bag of cinema style popcorn.

I was a pawn in a chess game. And as threatened as I felt inside the prison, all my worries fell away as I hurled myself into my seat, slammed the door and opened my bag. Family size! It stated on the packaging. Err.. no. I would eat the whole thing my self. Thank god for fast metabolism... I even ran 5 times a week. I wasn't skinny, but certainly not fat. As a teenager I loved candy too much, and with a puberty attacked metabolism, I was quite large. I have the stretch marks to show for it. It was much to my parents dismay; they were elegant and rich. I weakened the quality of our family image. At 16 I had a revelation with my health, and cut out gluten and sugar from my diet. This was before it became a 'fad'.

Now, I find that people are quick to judge when you tell them you are on a restrictive diet. I don't think it helps that I am young. I just seem like any other classic Londoner. What a shame.

At least I wasn't in prison.

I started my car. The engine hummed. Turning up the Beatles from my CD player, I settled the popcorn in my lap and took a huge handful, stuffing it in my mouth. Some of it got stuck in my super curly hair.

There was a knock at my window, I jumped Jesus christ...

It was Jim, tapping at the glass with one slender finger. I was surprised it could be so loud. I hurriedly tried to pick out the half popped kernels and brushed them off my lap. Only then did I slowly roll down my window. Oh.. I'm so embarrassed... I groaned internally.

Jim stooped down, so low was the window compared to his massive height that the angle of his back almost looked painful. I guessed he was around 6'4. It would be intimidating, but I think my own height is equally impressive. Once again, I was put off by his aloofness. It was quite rude. Although there was a sense of power around him from his composure, I certainly didn't respect him for it.

He wasn't a hunky sort of man. More of the beautiful type, with prominent cheekbones, a long face with a shadow on his chin. I was strangely drawn to him in all my negative feelings.

"So... I was just wondering.." His voice was raw and controlled. A very low essence.

I cut him off before he could finish, "errr, you know Jim... I'm not really looking for anyone at the moment."

He gave a relieved laugh," oh my gosh, sorry." He held his hands up in defence, his head bobbed above the window and I was looking at his angled chest for a second. "I didn't mean to come across like that." He rushed his words out. I had made him nervous. "No, I was just asking if you wanted to grab a coffee later this afternoon."

I looked at him as to ask if he was stupid. "Forgive me, but that sounds exactly like what I don't need. I'm not sure if you heard me the first time but...."

This time it was Jim who interrupted, "Treat it like business?" This so didn't sound like business. "Like an interview..." He relaxed and let his hands hang I to the car on the edge of the window.

I grabbed a black sharpie from a cup holder and caught hold of one of his hands. I felt him baulk at the touch, but after the initial panic, his hand settled into my grip. I noticed how warm and large it was, it has lost the peculiar coldness. I felt oddly comforted; I'd been lacking human touch. "This.... Is .... My number." I finished off, biting my lip. Oh shoot, was that leading him on? Some people say that's flirting.. I didn't mean to flirt. My face quickly returned to neutral, my teeth let my lip go.

"So... Did you just see Megan?"

"Yep.." I rested my hand on the steering wheel, the other on the clutch. Prepared to go.

"How is she?"

"Seems.... Fine." Or as good as one can be in prison.... I scoffed to myself

He nodded slowly.. "That's good."

"Yep." The conversation stalled. I took a quick breath and decided to get straight to the point. "You say that Megan is full of lies and not to get to attached. But, when you speak of her, you sound like you care..." Or at least I think you do....

"Megan's a nice girl, I'll admit to that." He gently rubbed his chin with his sexy fingers... Oops I meant long... Fingers that is. "But we can never know if here personality is real.. Or a facade..... We just have to be wary." I could imagine us awkwardly debating about Megan all afternoon. With a jolt I realised how bad our coffee meeting would actually be. What had I got myself in for....