Behind The Mask

Chapter 50

Anouk's POV

Michael's influential machine moved swiftly. The charges against me were dropped, Somerville handed in his resignation, all within a week. I was impressed, I have to admit. Meanwhile, Michael was caught up in a project. He spoke of it vaguely, but I came to understand that it was not because he didn't trust me with business stuff, that's how he works. He takes one million ideas, analyzes them, discards them and in the end he retains just one perfect idea. Over breakfast or dinner he'd speak about getting together with some people he worked with for this charity, then he'd speak of a new song, and then of plans for his next album.

"I want to move on from my old image", he said earnestly to me, while we were having a quiet evening in the open patio. There were tapas and wine on the table and we fed each other and talked freely.

"What do you have in mind?"

"Something...different. I realize that I've got myself into a mess trying to be Mr. Nice Guy all the time. I've watched my Oprah interview, bits of it really, a few days ago, and I cringed inside. I looked and acted like a retarded moron. Then there was that fiasco of an interview with Lisa. God, I was such a fool! I acted like a lovesick puppy around her, and she sneered at me whenever she could."

"You were not a fool. You were just...yourself. Open, loving, childish sometimes....but always a kind and loving guy. It's who you are and if someone snubs that, then they're a bunch of fakes. You know, people act fake and do shit because deep inside they're empty and they know it. They don't have anything genuine to offer, so they put up a show."

"You summed it up just right. Nooki.... you mean the world to me because you have so much to offer and you're not afraid to show yourself in your true colors. I am glad I solved this issue with your university, because I want you to shine, girl. I want you to go back there and be the best, get your diploma. And then I want you to get your smart ass in my foundation and put some order in there."

"It bothers you, doesn't it?"

"It's worse than people stealing from me. Because they're not stealing from me, they're stealing from sick, underprivileged children. And this makes me mad....I won't condone it. People put their faith in me and donate for children and a few crooks take that money to pay for hookers, drugs and Lord knows what else!"

His anger is real and I let him vent. He needs to do this, because I feel that he has so many things pent up, never expressed in words and they're eating at him.

"Can you believe Joseph still tries to contact me and get me to do another Jackson 5 gig??? And Lisa is writing to my mother and cornering everyone associated with me, trying to get my new phone number? Why does everyone want a piece of me so badly? What does Lisa want from me now? She was very adamant that she did not want to have my children. How can you pretend that you love someone and not want his children?"

"I told you, Mike. That's not love. It's possession. It's about control. Knowing you have someone under your thumb. People act in many weird ways and they claim it's for love. But they have no idea what love is."

"You do, Nooki. You know how to feel and express love. Even when you let me rant about random stuff...that's a sign of love."

He raised the glass of wine and put it to my lips.

"Just one more sip, and that's enough sugar intake for you today, baby."

I sigh. I no longer need my glucose calculator, I have Michael. He knows what kind of sugar intake is in every bloody thing I'm eating or drinking. And he keeps a strict count of everything.

"What's wrong, baby?"

"You've changed already. See, that's what I wanted to avoid. This bloody overprotectiveness. Enough sugar intake for today, enough physical exertions for now, let's just take a break and rest, you look a little pale, Nooki. You're just like mom."