Can't Be True

Who Am I?

My name Kat, short for Kathrine. I'm sixteen years old and I am now enduring my junior year of high school. However I have a reoccurring problem. Well, it's a problem that my friends seem to notice more than I. I haven't had a boyfriend.  I don't comprehend why though, I don't find men sexually appealing. On the other hand, I never noticed the distaste with men. There's nothing physically wrong with me. I guess you can say I'm quite popular. I'm 5'4'' with long chocolate blonde hair and green, Amber eyes. I have a slender waist with a c-cup bra size. To maintain my feminine yet athletic built I attend dance class on my free time. When I'm not amusing my boredom with the power of dance. I spend time with my adoring long time friend Rosie. I absolutely adore her with all my heart                                 art. She came over this morning to pick me up for school. I'm so bored of school already; nothing interesting about it. I was getting ready for school when I heard my mom yell from down stairs that Rosie was here to pick me up. I quickly rushed down stairs, kissed my mom on the cheek and ran to the car door. Once I sat down in the passenger's seat, I can feel the tension dispersing from her. I smile and turn to her " whats wrong my lovely" I know joking around is not the best idea, but it was worth a shot. She glanced at me with anger in her eye; I know its not directed towards me but I thought to myself and I remembered, her and her boyfriend were not having the greatest time right now. "Him right," I say sighing like I was exhausted. She nodded her head on the verge of tears. I hugged her but, she pulled back and looked at the time. "Oh my god, this shit has me all messed up, I'm so over it, come on lets get going before we're late again" she says " well, you're the driver," I respond jokingly and she nudged me and laughed softly. I know she's still hurting but what can I really do. She loves him and I don't have any experience relationships besides the undying love for my cat which  that is a one sided love. Once third period started I was just done with school, and wanted nothing more than to go to lunch. Rosie sits in front of me, so I started braiding her  long blonde hair. Its so soft in my finger tips. I got  a warm fuzzy feeling. I smiled leaned forward and kissed her cheek and leaned back into my desk. She turned back and smiled at me. So I took out my phone and texted her.

This class is so boring I hate math.

She replied " I know but its important so pay attention, plus we only have ten minutes left you'll be fine."

"ugh I don't want too" I texted and grunted softly to myself. I looked out the window and I can see the leaves blow around on the trees. It has been cold lately. All I want is to be outside in the cold wind and feel the breeze on my cheeks. I was startled by the school bell to switch classes, but in my case to go to lunch. I looked up from my daydream to see Rosie starring at me. " ready to go to lunch or stay and learn more math" she smirked. I jumped up "hell no lets go" I smiled and grabbed my bag. When we approached our table for lunch two of our friends were already sitting there. Amanda and Jacob were sitting talking to each other. We sat in front of them and we sat our lunch on the table. 

"hey guys whats the news today" I said as I opened my water to take a drink.

Jacob looked at Amanda then back at me "well I don't know but I heard we're expecting a new student."

" No way! A new student we never get one of those" I smiled 

"Kat, don't speak of them as if they were a new toy'' Rosie said as she began to take a bite of her salad.

I giggled and looked at Amanda " how are you" 

" I'm okay, I'm just really tired today'' she said quietly. 

I starred at her, she was acting strange she wouldn't even look at Rosie. Amanda is normally cheerful and talkative. I starred her down and Rosie nudged me. Amanda stood up quickly and stormed off. 

" what the fuck is her problem" I exclaimed. I looked at Jacob " what do you know" 

" I got to go" Jacob said and tried to get up.

" No what do you know. Jacob don't lie to me we've when been friends since second grade"

" Amanda kissed Rosie's boyfriend" he said and put his face into his palms. I looked at Rosie and I can see the hurt in her expression  and the tears form in  her eyes. I touch her hand softly and she started to cry. 

" Rosie I am so sorry, she just told me before you guys came here." Jacob said in a panic. 

Rosie stood up and pick up her tray " lets go Kat" and I stood up with her. Jacob jumped up and ran to Rosie then grabbed her hands softly. " Please don't hate me. I just only found out myself; I'm sorry"Jacob said sadly. Rosie looked at him and  said, " it's not your fault this happened. Relax, I am not mad at you." 

We made our way to the other side of the cafeteria; there stood Amanda and Rosie's boyfriend Chris. He was leaning against the wall with his arms crossed while Amanda was crying and talking to him. He seemed upset but he should be, he's a asshole and cheated on my best friend. Who does that! I rushed to him and smacked him in the face. He pushed back in shock and put his hand over the place I hit him. I was so mad I got ready to smack him again till Rosie grabbed  my hand. I looked over and saw  Amanda pleading to me not to be violent but who wouldn't be after the news they were told. I approach Amanda and I heard Rosie telling me not to hit her too. 

" How could you do something like this to your best friend." I said to her in a calm voice.

She looked at her feet and cried softly barely able to look at me. The guilt rushed over her. " I'm sorry Rose I didn't mean for any of this to happen. Last night I went the diner down the road, I was going on a blind date that my mom had set up for me. I waited an hour and he didn't show up. I was so upset. Chris came in the diner as well. He was picking up food for his uncle and he saw me crying. He sat in front of me and I told him what happened. I was so in need for affection. He held my hand trying to comfort me; I don't know. I just leaned forward and kissed him. I promise he didn't kiss me back he just pulled back and said he can't. I'm sorry I didn't mean to betray you. It meant nothing to me."

" I understand but I can't trust you anymore. If you want to continue to be my friend it will be while before I forgive you," she looked to her boyfriend and frowned "we'll talk after school." 

Later that day I laid in my bed staring at my ceiling, thoughts rushed through my head on what had happened today. I felt bad and I was so mad that any of this had happened. I heard a ding from my phone and looked at it. I received a text from Rosie saying she isn't going to stay with her boyfriend and that she was moving in two weeks. Shock overwhelmed me, I dropped my phone to the bed. " what the fuck, how could she just leave me? We're best friends." 

The next day, she came to pick me up, instead of rushing to the car like normal I took my time. I was still upset. When I sat in my seat I felt her watching me. Without looking at her I said, "what," she frowned and said " I don't understand why you're pouting like that. This is not my fault, plus we can still visit each other." She smiled at me trying to improve my mood, I wasn't accepting it.

Days past and we said our good byes, of course tears were shed. What am i going to do now. In the evening I decided to take a walk.  I walked through my neighbor hood and three doors down from my house a family was moving in. A married couple with a daughter. I thought to myself " she looks like she's my age, wow she's cute." I was surprised by my own thoughts I shock my head and kept walking. When I reached their house the woman approached me, so I took out my head phones from my ear and smiled.