MISTAKES 2 (Tronnor fanfic)

#7 Door

CONNORS POV

"We really need to go back kids. Do you wanna see Tro?" I gulp as I walk out of the bedroom I had texted him in, sweating and nervous of the man I love and our future.
if there was going to be one.

Levi still sits in the feeding chair and eats his porridge, splashing it everywhere and all over his face as Petra just sits on a chair with her second coffee cup.

Petra looks at me with that one face, that tells you You're sure? Really? And I glance at her on the motion Trust me okay?
"Daddy daddy daddydaddy yayyy!! Are we going soon?" He smiles at me as I grab a napkin to clean all the porridge off his face and the stool.

"If you want to." I sigh barely noticable and Petra takes Levi to the car to wait for me. We hadn't done anything that messy, so I grabbed the not unpacked luggage and walked to the car.

After an half an hour of driving, I started for some reason feel very anxious. Even if it was Troye. I hope he isn't drunk. That would be not good...

'You worthless piece of shit!!!'

Shivers. Levi was asleep and Petra was on her phone. I just stared blankly at the snowy highway. It would soon be Christmas. That will be nice. If Troye doesn't drink. And I'm still confused. Why did Levi say there that Daddy don't hurt me? Did Troye really do something? No, he wouldn't. He is not like that. I hope...
Because then I would propably never trust him again.

TROYES POV

I woke up in a huge hangover once again. But today, I felt an urge to stay clean. To get a hold of myself. To fresh up and take showers and just chill, but no drinking.
If I can.

I sighed once again, feeling that lump in my throat when I didn't see messy, brown hair resting on the pillow next to me. No sniveling and snuggling against me. No smile, that lights my heart on fire and makes it jump around aimlessly. No forest-greeny eyes, tired and happy as the wrinkles under his eyes would come when he laughs.
No Connor.

I rose from the oddly cold bed to the cold reality and straight to the steaming shower, eating Hangover pills to let my headache escape for - I wish - the rest of the day.

I walked downstairs with my morning robe and saddened my mood by looking at the empty dinner table.
Shit, they
Left me?? Hated me?? They're not coming back, you know.
had left. But just temporally. I hope.

I grabbed a toast and stuffed it to my mouth, not even caring to toast it or butter it up. I just wanted my husband back. And my daughter. I wanted my son back. My beautiful son.
The son you hit. Remember?

My heart skipped a beat and I sighed loudly for the millionth time. I just want to be normal. To live a normal life.
I heard someone parking the car and two small legs running towards the wooden outdoor, and my hope was raised to the clouds and heart pumped like this would be the last day I live.

I ran to the window and felt the tears of joy fill my eyes and run down my pale cheeks.
They were here.

Someone opened the front doow and I ran to grab Levi to my arms and hug him tight and he giggled.
"Yay! Daddy!!" I cried so hard. I cried so hard from joy and happiness. My beautiul son was here. I put him down and he hugged me one time more, and I grabbed him to sit on my shoulders. He held my hands for balance and I kept him safe so he wouldn't fall and hurt himself as I went to hug Petra and saw Connor.
He looked at me and I smiled. But he had this disgusted, pity look in his eyes, shaming me with his eyes and shaking his head as he walked past me with the luggage, straight upstairs.

"Okay Levi, I need to ask you something. Can daddy trust Levi with a secret question?"
"Sure, dad." He smiled. And sat beside me outside, on the steps.

"Why is Con angry? Is he angry at me?" Levi hesitated for a second.
"Yeah. Daddy is angry because he thinks you are bad. I don't think so."
I looked at the ground.

"And he said something about dee-vor-cee but I'm not sure what that means. I'm going inside now!" He smiled and waved at me and I waved back just a bit.

Divorce, huh?
Great.
Just motherfucking great. Why don't you just tell me then, Connor? If you really want to go away?
I didn't leave him. I never did.

I walked the steps upstairs and glanced at my sweaty palms. I was really nervous. Did he really want a divorce? Really?
What am I supposed to say then?
Yeah I heard from our son that you wanna leave I can get you a taxi if you want.

I walked and stopped at the open door and Connor was sitting on the bed, back facing me and a picture of us two in our wedding... Soon I saw two small drops drip on the glassed picture in the gold coloured frames. He was crying. He really hated me.
Really much.

I sat beside him and he burried his face in his hands.
"What are we going to do, Troye?!" I gulped and tge tears staret come out again.
I wrapped my arms around him and hugged him tightly, he didn't resist. He rested his crying figure on my soulder and I rested my head on his.

We just were there. We didn't even have to talk to know what we thought. We just... Knew. We didn't know what we had to do. But we knew that we were going downhill, more and more as the problems were just kept inside.

He moved away from me and wrapped himself in the bedsheets. He was exhausted, and I understood that.

I kissed him on the cheek, shut the door and fell on the ground to sit, leaning to the door.
The door that held my sleeping husband. A little bit like always. There was a thick, wooden door between us that could be opened but either one of us had the courage to do that.