Goodbye (One Shot)
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Somehow, I couldn't say whether I see it coming or not. But one thing is for sure; there are times I keep on looking on the yesteryear and I'm still afraid of waving back to your goodbye.
I remember when we were exchanging text messages, flowery words and whatnot. Maybe, we didn't know what we're doing that time. We just got lost on our own spaces and we circled on the articulation of our tongues that tickle our fickle mind; we're almost near to oblivion and I took the risk. I didn't mind getting past the midnight without kissing the moon goodbye because you were the sunset I could stand glaring at the whole time; one that I would trade for the night. But what happened? You didn't come one afternoon, and I felt like I lost sight of you. But you were in my hands and I've been the sea you've always want to lie down on. I baffled your warmth so we could balance each other. I remember when you said you can't take your eyes off of him, and I want to remind you what we have, I want to be an alarm for a hint you can't give me directly. I didn't guess it was a goodbye for us. This can't be. It's impossible. We're invincible because you made me feel like engulfed in the chains we bridged ourselves. But I know one day you'll leave. And maybe that's why, you keep on saying "Dear, we don't know what the future beholds so let's just savor today." You were right. I was complacent enough that it was just a euphemism of us, not making it to forever. I didn't have the time to connect all of the clues you've been trying to make me comprehend. And you outsmart me for you didn't give the pieces on a linear lapse of time. You did it by season. You make sure it won't shatter me big time. Maybe I just ran out of time to figure what's ahead of us and what's really up to that relationship we had. I ran out of time because I was so busy anchoring everything of me to yours because you were my orbit; that no matter how dazed off I'd be, and no matter how far I fall, I'd always find myself in your arms. But maybe, our love wasn't strong enough to defy the gravity that kept our feet on the ground because we always want to fly, to go somewhere else; remote and privy — just for the two of us, just for the two of us. I keep saying this to myself like my favorite song on repeat. But maybe it's true that we won't see things clearer when we're enthralled by love, that it's almost over for the both of us. That ending what you have even if you're not experiencing any tremendous problems is worse than breaking up after a series of conflicts and confrontations. That there are people who love each other that much and yet the situation won't permit them to. You told me, you needed space for yourself. And I knew what you want, I'm just too afraid to admit that for I don't want to hear myself say that I fall short of loving you because I didn't. Tears ran down in my face when you were jealous of someone, and that's a sweet stress for me, for the both of us. But my tears that moment are more vivid, they somewhere flaunt in the planes of my face. They are made of tears and they are denser. And I wiped them away for I don't want to be more upset than the feeling I've collected that fed the butterflies in my stomach.
I apologized for having things in your life disoriented. I know that I should have not done that 'cause I don't deserve that. But you were almost closing things for the both of us. You kept me hanging and left me flabbergasted and waiting for things to be clarified. And I thought, that is the prologue to our goodbye.
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