His Hidden Little Secrets

January 18th BDC

GUYS!!! IM SO SORRY FOR NOT UPDATING IN SO LONG! I've been SO busy lately (like you have NO idea). However, I am now planning on updating every Sunday and I will try so hard not to let you guys down! Thanks so much for all of your support! You guys are so amazing :) love y'all! Continue to read, favorite, and comment your thoughts please!

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I didn't talk to Carter for a while after the making-out incident (as in a while, I mean 48 hours). It pained my heart to be so distant from him, but he deserved it, right? I mean, just a feel simple insulting words can make you want to shoot somebody. And plus, I told him to be my best friend at school, not my lover. He was so hot and cold all the time. He HURT me. I WAS NOT HIS TOY.

Should I just dump him? I thought.

No, I couldn't. He was too fragile. I have the right to be mad, even though I take everything WAY to personally, but I don't think I deserve the right to leave him like this.

~~~~~~

I woke up at 5:30 am to my phone vibrating. What now? I thought. Can't I just sleep for once?

Then, something weird happened.

I have a secret, my mind told me.

I have a secret to keep. I have a secret to keep. I have a secret to never ever share.

What? That didn't make any sense.

Whatever, I thought. I was probably just drowsy from just waking up.

I roll over to the dresser on the side of my bed and pick up my phone and turn on the screen. There's a text from Carter; of course.

I know what you think of me, the text reads. You think I'm a fuckboy. You think I just want you for sex. But I don't want sex from you. I want to only show you how much I love you.

Well, okay, I think.

My phone vibrates again. Come over, Baby. I want to make you happy. I have something to show you, the text reads.

I HAVE A SECRET my mind screams I HAVE A SECRET.

I know what you're thinking, Carter texts.

I, Saige St. George, knew what I was thinking. Yet, I didn't at the same time.

Before I could stop myself, I grabbed my jacket and pulled on some combat boots and a beanie and walked outside into the winter morning air. I felt... Edgy. I always tried to impress Carter by dressing "hipster" like, and I hoped he liked it when I did. I then got into my car and drove to his house.

When I finally got there, he was sitting on the front porch, vaping. He made vape rings in the air by making "pop" movements with his mouth, but he stopped when he saw me.

Something freaking fishy was going on; I knew it deep down.

I got out of my car and slammed the door. I stared at him in disgust. "What the hell, Carter?" I cried. "You're vaping now?"

"It's helping me to stop drinking and doing weed and stuff," he said to me, flatly. "There isn't really any research that says vaping is bad for you, so don't yell at me."

"I'm not going to yell at you," I said. "It just makes you look dumb, that's all."

Carter smirked. "Well, I sure hope you like dumb men, because you're stuck with me."

Then I got butterflies. Why was I getting butterflies?!

I made a face at him. He smiled.

"You know, I didn't think you would come over," he said after a moment.

I found myself smiling back and saying, "I can't stay away from you for long." I immediately regretted saying that. For saying the truth, honestly.

He chuckled, stood up, and took a few steps towards me so that our faces were centimeters from touching. His breath smelled like bubble gum, which I internally laughed at, because Carter didn't seem like the kind of person who would like sweet and pink bubble gum.

He brushed my tangled hair away from my face. "Come inside, Babe," his voice scratched. "I want to show you something."

God, I wanted him so bad. So bad.

He took my hand and brought me to his bedroom, where I had been many times before, but instead of this time being messy, it was clean and organized and didn't smell like dirty socks.

"You cleaned your dump." I laughed lightly. "Is this what you wanted to show me?"

"Yes and no." He walked over to his bed and picked up... A bible?!

I thought I was going to get kissed. I almost had to cover my mouth to stop myself from gasping or laughing. I was very Christian, but Carter? Not so much.

"Why do you have a bible?" I asked, trying not to act as surprised as I was.

Carter grinned. "Funny story..."

I raised an eyebrow.

"So..." He laughed. "I was hanging out with some guys that I met last night at a bar... And before you ask, no I didn't drink. But anyways, I was talking to them and they asked me if I had a Girl, and I told them yes, and she's smoking hot, too..."

I blushed.

"...And they were all like, 'Dude, tell us details!', so I told them about your beautiful features and how amazing you were, and..." He paused and frowned. "I ended up telling them the things I've done to you."

I was quiet for a moment. "The bad stuff?"

"Yeah."

"And your point is..?"

"One of the guys shook his head at me and looked me strait in the eye and said, 'Man, you need Jesus.' And it wasn't a joke, either."

I almost snorted. "So you took his advice, huh?"

He gave me a half-smile. "I did."

I found myself walking over and sitting next to him on his bed. "Have you been reading?"

Without responding to my question, he turned to one of the pages of Romans. "Romans 13:10," he read from a highlighted verse, softly. "Love does no harm to its neighbor."

He flipped the pages to the chapter of Ephesians. He pointed his finger to the highlighted verse of Ephesians 4:2. "Be completely humble and gentle, be patient; bearing one another in love. Ephesians 4:2."

He pulled me close to him and I rested my head on his shoulder. He turned to the chapter of Peter. "1 Peter 4:8. Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers over a multitude of sins."

I felt a tear roll down my cheek.

He turns to Song of Solomon. "This verse made me think of you the most, Saige Linnea," he whispers in my ear. "Song of Solomon 4:7 says this: You are altogether beautiful, my love; there is no flaw in you."

I burst into tears and latched on to Carter tightly. He held me in his arms just as hard.

"You have no idea how much I love and value you, Saige. You are the most beautiful person to ever walk the earth and I will never be able to love anyone else as much as I love you."

I buried my face into his shoulder and he kissed away one of my tears. My heart had exploded. I felt so safe, being so close to his strong body. I felt so in love.

"Never let me go, Carter," I whispered.

"Never," he whispered in response. "Never."

I have a secret. My mind whispered. I have a secret.

I looked up from Carter's shoulder and looked at the bible on his bed. It was now turned to the chapter of Luke, where a verse was highlighted; more boldly than the other verses he read to me.

I read the verse and screamed inside my head.

The verse said, 'Therefore whatever you have said in the dark shall be heard in the light, and what you have whispered in private rooms shall be proclaimed on the housetops. -Luke 12:3.'