CHAPTER ONE-
As I walk down the steps of my house, a few things were on my mind. School, and a friend. That friend, my dear reader, is Noah.
Noah was my best friend. Actually, he was my only friend. Besides my boyfriend Cameron, of course, But all of that changed. When you ask? Well, I'll tell you.
Noah killed himself this past spring. I knew something was up. And I feel as if I should have suspected it.
The date was April 30th, Noah and I were going to the movies. We have a movie night, at least, twice a month? We usually pick a movie with bad reviews so we can make fun of it. Noah didn't look like himself.He looked tired, but was still smiling. He kept glaring at me; like not one of those 'bestfriend' glares, but like a sad glare. One that you would do if you heard some bad news. I kept asking if he was alright. He responded with a slight nod of the head or a "yeah I'm okay, are you?" Typical Matt.
After the movie I Drove him home. It wasn't until I pulled up to his house when he handed me the note.
N: don't read it until you get home.
I nodded. He smirked and hugged me.
N: Eve, you really are my best friend. I love you.
Me: I love you too.
He was glaring again.
N: keep on fighting okay? Never put your head down. I'll always be here for you.
Me: alright Noah, see you tomorrow.
He looked down.
N: yeah, see you tomorrow.
I waved to him as I pulled away.
If only I knew, I would have told him not to. I know he would never listen, Noah was he kind of guy that when he sets his mind to something, there is nothing that can stop him. Most of the time that's a good thing, very motivational. Now isn't one of those times.
When I got home I poured a glass of lemonade and sat on the couch. I opened the note:
Eve,
As you read this note, please remember I love you, so much, and that I would never want to do this to you. But I just can't take it anymore. I can't sit around letting everyone bring me down. I have been depressed.
Like, very depressed. And I know you have noticed too, I can see it. I honestly just can't do this everyday, our movie nights aren't even exciting for me anymore. It's the same thing everyday; waking up into a full on nightmare, going to school, and coming home to my drunk dad, who doesn't give one shit about me. I could be living In a dumpster, for all he cares. And you are always busy with Cameron. So i'm alone. All alone. I don't want to live this life anymore. I started to take unnecessary pills, forcing it down my throat with alcohol. It has been getting bad. And as you read this, I have my fathers gun to my head. I. Want. To. Die. Please don't come for me. I only wrote this note to tell you that you were the only one that cared, thank you. So much. I love you. I will be watching up there, watching out for you. Meet up with you here someday. I'll be waiting.
Love, Noah
Of course I wouldn't listen to him. I ran into his house and into his room. He still had the gun to his head. I screamed his name and he whipped around. He was crying. Shaking his head. Saying no... No... No... He pulled the trigger and blood splattered on the other side of his head. His body fell to the ground, and I fell with it.
I watched my best friend die that day, and I thought that I would never be able to fill the broken part of my heart where he was.
It's now December. The beginning of winter, Christmas, and what is said to have lots of parties. I am not invited to any. Its my Third year if high school. I have probably been to about two parties. And my boyfriend was the host. thats the only reason I was invited.
Cameron is, great. He's an amazing boyfriend, cute, romantic, but he's popular. I'm more of a quiet person. And he always wants me to sit with him at lunch when honestly, I would rather sit alone listening to music. He sits with me sometimes...
One more thing, I'm bullied. Like severly bullied. I cry myself to sleep every night. And sometimes I think about dying. I feel like no one cares. But I won't leave. I will stay here, for Noah. For the both of us.
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