The state I'm in COMPLETED

Lonely heart

They say absence makes the heart grow fonder, and in my case, I guess that's true.

I missed Harry terribly. London was beautiful, exciting, everything I had imagined—but no matter how busy I kept myself, I couldn't shake the feeling of loneliness. My days were filled with studying, assignments, and trying to keep up with university back home. I wanted to make the most of this opportunity, but the truth was... I missed home. I missed Harry.

I missed his laughter, his teasing, the way he'd call me baby and kiss my forehead when I was upset. I even missed the stupid, jealous, possessive version of him—the one who acted all caveman-like when someone so much as looked my way. And God, I missed his touch.

At first, he called every day. Sometimes twice, sometimes three times, joking that he was like a prescription pill—"one after every meal." That made me laugh. We'd skype every other day when he wasn't picking up Antony, and he'd tell me how much he missed me, how much he loved me.

Then the custody battle started.

And everything changed.

The calls became less and less. Some days, they didn't come at all. When I called, sometimes he answered, sometimes he didn't. His texts were shorter, rushed. He'd say he was with the lawyer or handling things with Nadia. I didn't want to complain—I knew he was under a lot of stress—but the truth was...

I felt like I was losing him.

Then, one night, I saw an ad for cheap last-minute flights to London—but they were only available for the next twenty minutes. Without even thinking, I bought him a ticket.

Excited, I called him immediately.

"Harry!" I said breathlessly when he answered.

"Yeah? What is it? What's going on?" he asked, confused by my enthusiasm.

"Guess what?"

"Babe... you know I'm no good at guessing games." His voice was flat, impatient.

"But you haven't even tried," I said, the excitement fading.

"Val, just tell me."

I swallowed my disappointment. This wasn't the reaction I expected.

"Okay, okay—I got you a ticket to come see me!" I announced, waiting for his shout of excitement.

Instead, there was silence.

"Em... really?" he finally said. "How did you—?"

"I got it super cheap online!" I explained, still trying to keep the excitement alive.

"But... I can't make it, Val."

The words hit me like a punch.

"You don't even know the date," I whispered. "Don't... don't you want to see me?"

"I do," he said. "Of course, I do. But... I have the court procedures, and I need to be here for signatures and... stuff."

It was the way he said it. The way he sounded so... detached. Like I was an obligation. Like I was something on his to-do list.

"So... you definitely can't make it?" I asked again, though I already knew the answer.

"When is it again?" he asked, pretending to care.

"This weekend."

"Yeah... I can't. What about Rose? Can't she come?"

Rose?