The cold dark blade felt good slicing through the tissues of my skin taking on layers until the hot red useless blood wash my pain down my cheap,ugly no longer white sink. I felt as if I had control of everything. Though no one ever detected me I felt transparent like a glass display for everyone to see and make fun of. No! Not right now. Now is my time to wash my despair away, to leave my pains behind. My blood stained the sharp blade as I write on my arm. I let out my mourn cry as I spent the last seconds of my freedom in the bathroom. I ran up to my room, but it was to late, the chilling monster called upon me. “ Linda what were you doing in the bathroom so long?” “ Why don't you mind your own business mom and get the heck out of my life!” And that is how most of my nights ended with a big pink hand mark on my paled freckled face.
The rays of the sun heat my face in the morning. As every cutting girl or emo I wear black, it is said by all kids that emos usually wear black, I don't care I just personally like black. I also always wear long sleeves to hide the embarrassing scars. The scars on my arms are sometimes too unbearable. They remind me of all my pain, suffering, loneliness. A note greets me in the kitchen:
There is peas in Refrigerator. You're getting to fat.
Grr,I hate her. She'sbeen more of a enemy than a mom. A few years my dad and I fled to Disney World and I watched him die in a puddle of red dark evil pain. After that mom started blaming me for the death of my father and she stopped loving me. A honk interrupted my thoughts, as I climb in the Ashley's beautiful stylish car I complained, “Ashley! You scared the heck out of me!”
“Sorry.”
I glanced at my best friend and suddenly had the serge to dig deep in my flesh with the blade of the knife. She was so lucky she had those big brown eyes and big full tropical fruit colored lips and she had money.
"I don't think so Ashley. Sorry. Oh no.” I let out a great big groan. “It's Katherine.” Katherine was a shark in pink lip gloss and designer mini dresses.“So Emma, you have a tummy ache! The poor baby!”
“Shut up Katherine, at least I don't have wrinkles.” I smirked when that wiped the pout off her face.
“ OK um Emma lets go to class.” Ashley had a way of letting go, but me on the other hand can not let it fly past me. “Um, I have to use the restroom. See ya later.”
“K, bye.” I rushed to the bathroom, and barged into the stained wall that is now filled with graffiti and cuss words. I carefully unfolded the napkin to reveal the newly sharpened razor. I let out a small gasp as I felt the familiar slicing of my skin cells. The tiny tears of blood fell into the still water mixing immortality with mortality. I feel the fire of power within me once again. I feel it, the ounce of hope. This world can't hurt me, not with my lifesaver beside me. I glanced at the stall walls and there, in a tiny sophisticated cursive are the words: Your life matters. I glance at the deadly silver blade now stained with my DNA. How can my life matter when I carry this death ray? I let out a loud groan. Oh no, I'm late for class! Mr. Hanfey is going to be pissed at me! I stuffed my backpack and ran to math class. “So that is how x+y/t+56%=45%. Oh! Mrs. Edgar please do join us and you'll also be joining Mr. Baker on Saturday Detention.” Ring!
“ Why'd you take that long? I was worried sick! You-”
“ Um Emma? Can I talk to you for a sec?” I saw a girl with freckles and a pale face that match her thin line that people may confuse as lips. I think her name is Jennifer.
“ Yea.”
I looked at her expecting for her to spill, but instead she walked to a far corner. I gave Ashley a look that read What is she doing? She shrugged and motioned me to follow. I started to get wild dangerous tiger butterflies.
