baddragonxx
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The stage was dark, Seunghyun looked out at the sea of yellow lights that made the crowd look like the night sky. The low *hum* of the crowd patiently waiting for the song to start. Soon the begining of the song came on and Seunghyun started his lines the bright light shinning down on him. The warm glow making it hard to see the crowd. After he's done his part he looses himself in the other memebrs voices. After Seungri is Jiyong and that's where he looses his composure to think of anything else but him. His voice is like an angels, the high notes and low notes are plucking the strings of old scars of their past. Seunghyun knows this song is about him, he can feel it in the way Jiyong sings the lyrics. Looking over he can see the passion Jiyong is putting into singing his part.
With each word its own pain, and its heartbreak. Truth be told It wasn't really anyones fault when it happened they had just drifted apart, but somewhere in Seunghyun's head he felt it was more his fault the Jiyongs. And even though they were together now and happy didn't mean Seunghyun didn't see all the insecurities and fears when Jiyong looked at him. When once he had looked at him like he was the world now his eyes looked like they were counting down to when he would leave again. Jiyong would put on a smile of course to tell him he was fine and the past was in the past but his smile didn't reach his eyes or glow like it did before. When they would make love he could feel Jiyong lying awake after whispering words he would never tell Seunghyun unless he was asleep, becuase Jiyong was afraid he would leave him again if he told him of his fears. He would say words like "please don't leave me" or "I can't live without you again, It would kill me" and simply just "I love you" over and over again, and everytime time it broke Seunghyun's heart to know that Jiyong didn't trust him with his heart anymore. Seunghyun had broken Jiyong's heart from the begining, from the moment he told Seunghyun he loved him and got rejected.
But though all their ups and downs Jiyong has giving Seunghyun his heart, and over the years he had become accustomed to always getting Jiyong's love no matter what because he thought it was his privilege to have it. But now it's not, because Jiyong has locked it away form him in a box that only he knows the code to. Jiyong doesn't trust him with his heart, becuase he's preparing fo rhim to leave again. And Seunghyun does love Jiyong, with all his heart and he doesn't plan to let him go again, but finding some way to prove that to him is a different story entirely. Seunghyun has never been good with words and up till now Jiyong called all the shots in their relationship. He knows after this last song when they all go back stage Jiyong will smile and try and hide his insecurities from him, but his eyes won't glow. In the end he knows what he has to do, he has to show Jiyong that he is worthy of the code to his heart, he has to convince him that he will not walk away from him again.
The end of the song breaks Seunghyun out of his thought as the stage goes black and all members walk off the back, Seunghyun goes quick because he needs to see Jiyong. He needs to tell him that he has no intension of letting him go ever again, because a life without Jiyong is not a life he wants to live again.
He goes into the dressing room and the other members are waiting in there, Youngbae is sitting in a chair getting is makeup taken off and Daesung is changing into more casual clothes to go party after. But Jiyong is no where to be seen, Seunghyun looks around trying to find his missing boyfriend, "Bae have you seen Jiyong" he asked turning to where Bae was sitting, Youngbae nodding and points in the direction of Seunghyun private dressing room. He never did like to show his body to others, except to Jiyong of course. So the staff gave him a seperate one to make him more comfortable. Walking down the long white hall he stops at the door, reaching out he grabs the door knob and turns it. When he walks threw the door Jiyong is sitting in the corner on the black leather couch playing on his phone. When he looks up from what he's doing he smiles and puts his phone away. Seunghyun walks over to him and pulls his arm up so he's standing in front of him. Jiyong looks startled, "Seun..." before Jiyong gets a chance to question what he's doing, Seunghyun pulls him closer and presses their lips together. And just like always Jiyong melts into his embrace letting out a soft moan as Seunghyun pushes harder against his lips flicking is tongue into his mouth, forcing all his love into Jiyong's mouth. When they finally pull away Jiyong is breathless, "what...what was that for?" Jiyong says pulling back to look Seunghyun in the eyes, "I love you" Seunghyun says, and as soon as he does he sees the flash of pain, and reluctance to indulge in the love Seunghyun is giving, because Jiyong knows hes said it before, and the last time around when he believed it he got hurt. So now he doesn't believe that love.
