----
"I don't have to fucking tell you anything" was Brendon's response whenever someone asked if he and his bandmate, Ryan, were dating. He knew that it was a bit harsh, but after repeatedly being asked this invasive question, you get a bit tired, y'know?
To put it simply, Brendon and Ryan were dating. But they couldn't tell anyone. They couldn't risk their career. It's 2007, being into someone of the same gender isn't okay yet in the everyone's eyes.
---
Brendon had his hand clasped tightly around his boyfriends wrist. He was pulling the taller one into the small bathroom at the back of the bus.
"Are you guys high?" They heard Spencer yell from the front. Brendon only laughed in response.
Ryan slammed the door shut and they got down to business. All clothing was removed in a hurricane of hands fumbling at hems and belts. Brendon was sitting on the sink and Ryan was pressed in between his legs. The older ones hands tangled in the others hair, tugging lightly.
The pair jumped when there was a loud pounding on the door.
"Are you guys fucking in there?" called the slightly agitated voice of their friend Jon.
Ryan let out a muffled "maybe". He had his head pressed in Brendon's neck and was bitting lightly. Brendon let out a loud moan and Jon sighed in response.
They almost forgot they were there.
----
They slept by the window that night. Brendon tucked between Ryan's legs, fast asleep. Before the younger fell asleep they wrote a poem on the window in the April fog. It was actually quite good so Ryan pulled out a notebook from the cabinet next to him and wrote it. He stayed up all night, adding to it, editing some of the original lines and trying to find a tune that would fit it.
By 5 a.m. Ryan had written a song for the beautiful boy laying between his legs. He titled it "Northern Downpour" for the rain storm outside.
----
"Why can't I just tell someone!" Ryan yelled, exasperatedly, "I'm fucking tired of this being a secret!" He moved his hands between him and the boy standing across from him. This was their fifth fight this week.
"Fine! Tell whoever you want! Our career will be over before our eyes because not everyone wants to support gay guys!" Brendon threw his hands in the air.
"You know thats not what I mean," Ryan sighed, running his fingers through his hair, "why are you so insistent on not telling anyone?"
"I don't have to fucking tell you anything," The younger one said, turning away.
"Fuck, Brendon," Ryan yelled, "I can't do this, you obviously don't love me like I love you."
"You don't know what I feel,"
"Brendon, we need to take a break."
"Fine,"
And with that, Ryan left.
----
The band broke up a few weeks later. There was too much tension. Brendon and Ryan couldn't work together anymore. Spencer and Jon couldn't stand being the ones holding the crumbling band together.
Before they made it official, Ryan pulled Brendon aside, eyes filled with pain.
"Why we're you so insistent on us staying a secret, Brendon? Please tell me." Ryan placed his hands on his ex-lovers shoulders.
"I care about you. I can write it all about it and I can sing it on stage but, I don't have to fucking tell anyone anything. I want some things private, us being one of them. If you're gonna push me to out us, I can't be in a relationship with you."
Ryan nodded. He kissed Brendon on the cheek and left the room, leaving him let some stray tears loose.
----
woahhhh my first ryden fic. As you can see, this song was literally written about ryden bc Halsey is a ryden and i have been dragged back to ryden hell bc of it. thnks ashley
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Strange Love {Ryden}
FanfictionEveryone knows Brendon and Ryan are dating. Their friends, the press, their fans. But they can't risk their career by letting everyone know. So it's a secret. And that's the beauty of a secret, y'know you're supposed to keep it. {song fic based on...
