It's the first of July and I completely hate this day. Well, actually no I don't. and I don't need to hide that here since... I can be totally honest. My name is Rose Lauren. I suppose I should start this off by writing a bit about myself and what exactly any of this is about.
I was born in California, Los Angeles, I come from immigrant parents but that's never had much of an effect on me. We've always had a decent way of living and neither my siblings nor I, have ever known such a thing as hunger or the yearn for something, my father has always made enough to support my family, which consists of my mother, and my two brothers. My sibling and I were spoiled kids, from the moment we came into this world to present day, but you see we were kids that were born into unique generations! My older brother was born when technology was still being experimented upon, while I was born with technology all around my surroundings, and alas my younger brother was born into an era of complete technology. Id like for you to know about my family, as a part of this "diary" I need you to know, e v e r y t h i n g, about me.
My dads name is Roberto Lauren , he was born in Mexico with a family that consist of 8 siblings, without a role model of a father and a hard working mother, my father pushed through his childhood and at the age of 12 he immigrated to the U.S. My father helped all of his family cross the border, excluding his father. All 3 of his brothers and 4 of his sister began a new life in America. Though they struggled in Mexico, they never knew true hunger and struggle, like my mother. My mother's family consist of 12 siblings, and her mother and father (both rather abusing), from birth my mother struggled to survive and grew not as a child but as an animal, living in mud for a home, finding food, bathing her siblings in a river, and watching as her father endlessly beat her mother and anyone else who'd stand up to him. At the age of 11 my mother left her small village, for the city and worked three jobs, to support her family's food at the table and clothes for her brothers and sisters. At the age of 21 she migrated to the States in search for jobs. My parents came from the ranch, yet only came to know of each others existence in the U.S..I was born in Malibu into a small home of three bedrooms, two bathrooms, a small living room, and a decent kitchen. 14 people lived in this small home, all struggling to keep a roof over their heads, I do not remember much but I remember the living room and rooms had beds in them, there was no light, simply what came from the sun, and a tiny fridge, as well as the odor of sweat.
Moving on, know that you have seen a bit of who I am and who my family is, I'd like to move on to, talking about me. At the age of 6 I was sexually abused by my fathers brother. At the time, I did not know what it was, or why he was doing it to me... all I knew was that, I didn't care, I didn't mind, he said it was game, and I believed him. Soon enough I began to play this "game" with others, cousins. Not exactly the same, but I'd do the small things like kissing. With 3, to be exact, I don't recall how it began, yet I know that it happened, I kissed them and they did it back. Two of them were young, and I know that they did not know any better than I did, but soon when one became older and understood exactly what it was this "game" was, he said to me
"I don't want to play this game anymore... I don't like it."
I never questioned him about it, though I did wonder 'why? I thought he had fun too? Why not play it'. Though I simply let it go, the second cousin, did the same thing, yet still I did not understand what was so wrong, I knew that for some reason the adult couldn't know, but that was all just rules of the game ( I will explain the rules later on ) . As for the third cousin, the same thing occurred, though my parents did find out some of what had happened, I managed to escape unseen, as for what I was, a liar.
By the fifth grade, I began to understand exactly what this "game" was. I began to see what had happened to me, and I intended to stop it. Though, this man, knew that this moment would come and he planned for it.
*(rule#1: never tell anyone )
