Rehab

o n e

"At a young age everyone is always telling you to never get involved in smoking or alcohol but they don't warn you about the damage that society is having on you. I used to be a happy little girl with big brow eyes and a crooked smile but when your teenage years come all you want to do is please everybody and fit in. Maybe that's how I got here, i'm not sure. I always felt the extreme need to have a thigh gape, perfect clear skin, and a flat stomach. It sometimes felt like the other girls weren't even putting in an effort for it but they were still perfect. I guess some skip the awkward teenage stage and just blossom beautifully, I think that if I were like that and I didn't have to go through the acne and braces stage of my life then I would have ended up a bit more normal."

"And what makes you think that you're not normal now."

"Is that a serious question? Look at where I am. I swear this is why some of us are still in here. You treat us like we're normal and we don't have a problem."

"Mrs. Jones everyone has their own problems but some people just seem to be better at excepting them. Like you for example, you seem to have convinced yourself that you problem is unfixable and that you'll feel this way for the rest of your life."

Thankfully when she finished her sentence the timer went off. I hated these stupid weekly sessions,the only reason that I would ever want to get better is so I could get out of here.

"I feel like we're making important progress here so I look forwards to seeing you next week." She said while getting out of her chair and placing her glasses on the edge of her nose.

I give her a slight smile but no words. I slowly get out my chair and make my way to the door. The halls of the place seem never-ending. All the walls bare and white with the same wooden floor flowing through the entire building. I should seriously sign this place up for extreme home makeover. I glance at my watch, 9:55. I quicken my pace so that I can get to the library before it shuts for the night. 10:00 is a stupid closing time anyways, I mean what if it's late and night and I want a good new read.

I get to the library at exactly 10:00 and I can see Joe starting to lock up. I quickly knock on the door and he looks back at me with a warm smile.

"You know we're closed now right Vi?" He greeted me.

"Yes but I have nothing to read and as said by Lemony Snicket, "Never trust anyone who has not brought a book with them." I told him with a cheeky smile.

"You have five minutes." He told me with a threatening voice but friendly eyes.

I roam the library slowly, half to piss of Joe and half to find the perfect book, sometimes I feel like i've already read all the great ones. I love coming to the library after hours because then I know that there's no one creeping around and taking up the aisles. After wandering for well over five minutes I select All The Bright Places by Jennifer Niven, I've never heard of it before but I do love books about love and suicides.

After getting the book and saying my goodbye and thanks to Joe I head back into the long hallway. I quicken my pace down the halls so I can get to the kitchen and make hot chocolate before curfew sneaks up on me. Curfew for a 17 year old is stupid anyways I mean 11 on weeknights, what if I get hungry or something and need a midnight snack.

I smile to myself when I find the kitchen empty, i'm not really in the mood to start some small talk with somebody. I put some milk into a sauce pan and let it begin to boil, and then get some cocoa powder out the cupboard. I think about leaving some extra behind in case anyone else wants some but i'm feeling too greedy tonight. After I finish making my hot cocoa I clean everything up and take my thermos back to my dorm room.

When my parents first stuck me in rehab I had a roommate but I couldn't stand her, she was always talking and having friends over so I punched her in the face in the middle of the cafeteria so I would be marked as an offensive and disturbing patient, which would ultimately lead to me being able to room alone. As you can tell I really go the extra mile to get my way.

I let out a sigh as I finally get to my room and put my stuff down. I lay on my back on my bed and just stare at the ceiling for about five minutes. I glance at my watch and see that it's already 10:47. I change into an oversized white shirt and some fuzzy socks and grab my new book.

When I start to read I can't get myself to stop. This happens to me often I get so sucked into a book that I can't seem to put it down and I end up getting minimal hours of sleep. At around page 275 I glance over at the clock and see that it's 3:02 am. I slowly get up and make my way to the bathroom to wash my face and brush my teeth. Afterwards I look in the mirror and see the horrific mess that is my hair, I know that no one will be seeing it for the rest of the night but I can already see myself in the morning; rushing to pull clothes on and get out of my room so I won't be late for the mornings activities. To plan ahead I put my hair in two french braids on each side of my head and go back into my bedroom.

I turn all my lights off and hop into my bed.