Hope for April

My name is April McNeill. I have 2 older siblings, a boy and a girl, Jennifer (she is blind) and Charlie (he is mute). I also have two younger siblings, yet another boy and girl. Their names are Chelsea (she is just a baby) and Jack (he is 5). My parents, Mary-Jane and David McNeill love us all very much, but never express much emotion, unless it is in arguments with each other. Living in 1915 is tough, what with disease spreading, but surviving in my world, with challenges I face, well that's a much harder place to survive in than disease-ridden northern Sydney.

You see, I am a very average person. I am not the top of the class for anything, but I'm not the bottom either. I am a quiet person, but I do speak. My older brother and sister are meek people, and they never talk. Ever. However Jack and Chelsea, my younger siblings are noisy and rowdy and are always creating chaos. As the middle child, I find myself in the middle. I am not silent like Jennifer and Charlie, but I am not noisy like Jack and Chelsea. I am average little me.

My father, the honourable Dr David McNeill is a very old fashioned man. He expects women to cook, clean, and raise children. If women strive for anything more than that, he thinks they are "stepping into a man's territory." My mother disagrees and expresses her opinion loudly and passionately. You have to admire the way she can yell a man to tears. Of course, Father would never cry in front of his children. My parents try to keep most things a secret from me (and all the other children for that matter). They think they are "protecting me from the harsh reality that I am too young to be exposed to," but they are not protecting me. They are doing quite the opposite.

Whenever I bring up school, Father crouches down so his eyes are in line with mine, his short, freshly oiled hair combed neatly back to reveal his deep wrinkles, and says this: "April, my dear April. You expect so much of the world. You are a brilliant young woman, and some day a very lucky man will marry you, and you will cook and clean, and raise a family. What are you doing, my sweet April, at (and I must add in here, that Father likes to add a pause to demonstrate his disgust for the proceeding word) SCHOOL! It is a waste of time. And money. Now Charlie and Jack, they need to go to school. They will learn business, or become a doctor, like me. Then they will grow wealthy, and support their families. Why must you bother with school? It will teach you nothing of what you need to know for the future. I might as well throw my hard earned money down the chamberpot!" And then I sigh, look up at Father, his big blue eyes looking soft and hopeful. He sees my face, shakes his head and walks away.

Then, Mother always replies on my behalf. "David! How dare you talk to MY (and she says this word with extreme ferocity and ownership) daughter that way! April is a talented young woman! She can do as she pleases. She is growing up, David. Soon she will move out. And she will need a job to support herself until she meets the man she will marry. For this, she will need an EDUCATION!" I know my Mother and Father mean well, but you must understand that it is very distressing to see that your parents have planned your whole future. I started thinking about everything that could go wrong. What if school just isn't for me, as Father says? Then Mother will surely despise me. What if I become a doctor or medical practitioner like Mother wants? Then Father will surely despise me. It distressed me to continue considering the possibilities, but luckily a loud crash changed the subject of conversation.

It turns out that the loud crash was just Jack who had broken a vase, though nobody saw, and he denied it. For this dishonesty, Mother and Father sent us all to our rooms. As I have mentioned previously, Father is a doctor, so our family is blessed with enormous wealth. Each child has their own bedroom, as well as ensuit, playroom for Jack

and Chelsea each, and a study desk for Jennifer, Charles and I. Mother is also pregnant, so there is a nursery awaiting the birth of little Thomas McNeill. Everybody that spoke a lot was cursing Jack, except for Jack himself -- he believed he did nothing -- so that was just Chelsea. But I on the other hand was happy to have a break from others. It gave me some time to think. I needed to decide whether staying in school was the right thing to do. On one hand Jennifer and all of her female friends went to school, but then again, I was sick of going with the flow. Maybe if I ate something it would help. It's too bad that Mother and Father have denied us supper tonight.