Undercover sket (Keisha's tale)

part12

i woke up early in the morning, i couldnt sleep atall. my mind was all over the place how could i cheat on dwayne  with someone i'd just met in the space of 2 hours. i needed help because i didnt wanna hurt dwayne no more, he was always there for me and he would always take me back but maybe i had to end it?maybe he was too good for me. i watched dwayne sleep then slipped out of bed , i walked into kiana's room and she was fast asleep too. both of my babies were sleeping not knowing what i was really like, maybe i didnt deserve kiana either; since rico died i went worse life got worse and i just decided to have sex alot. i thought about life if rico was still here i wonder how it would be and i wonder if i would have changed. he was the only boy that could change me and everyone knew it, i needed to get some air so i put my shoes on then started walking round. nobody was out because it was early morning but i found myself walking to rico's, the flat he lived in was empty up to this day. i stood outside it then burst into tears.

dwaynes pov:

i sat in bed thinking about how lucky i was, i finally got the girl of my dreams with me. i felt happy and excited for the future with me and keisha and kiana, maybe another chid? who knows. i slipped out of bed then went to check if keisha was in kiana's bed but she wasnt, i walked downstairs to see if she was there but she wasnt i rang her phone but i didnt get a answer. what would she be doing out now? at this time anyways..

1hourlater)

keisha came back into the house, she was looking bare upset and she looked like she'd just been sick or something. i pulled her closer for a hug but she pushed me away and started crying more:

me: whats happened?

keisha: dwayne, i dont deserve you. you need  someone faithfull to you.

me: but you are being faithfull keish, your the only girl i want

keisha: no no no. this has allcome out wrong, every bit of my life was a mistake accept from kiana, i just hurt everyone im not fit to be a mum let alone someones wifey 

me: but i love you.

keisha: im sorry dwayne this aint gunna work

me: why?

she walked out the room without replying and went to sit with kiana, i guess ive lost another person i cared about. why did i always mess up my relationships?

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months later*

my mum was looking after kiana for awhile cause things started to happen, basically im addicted to drugs. im  in prison  because of something i did, il explain what happened; i met some guy then he started giving me drugs and having sex with me whenever he wanted basically he was my pimp and men payed bare money to have sex with me, i liked it but this wasnt for me either i couldnt keep doing this to myself cause i had my baby kiana. anyways my mum found out then threatend to call social services on me if i didnt hand kiana over to her untill i got better, so i told her iwas gunna sort my self out. i didnt want kiana to go in a home like i did, i wanted kiana to have choices in life so i told her i was going on holiday for abit just untill i felt better, i cry every night thinking about my beautiful baby girl. i started self harming when i found out that dwayne killed himself, i dunno what made him do that but i guess he really did love me.  he was found dead in his apartment, i cry myself in this place cause i know im never gunna be able to see my baby. i got 4 years so i guess ive gotta do them 4 years, i got involved with prostitution and stabbed some man. i was high at the time so i didnt know what i was doing but now the memories come flooding back.

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before keisha went prison.

i found jamie and he was the right guy! untill i found out what he really was i couldnt get out of it. this was basically my life now new me and if that ment sleeping with men for money then thats what i was gunna do:

jamie: youve got another customer

me: i dont want to jamie

jamie: what the fuck have i told you about answering back? you wont get the stash i got you den 

(i was hooked on drugs so i'd do anything for it)

i felt emptyness inside i felt angry at myself,i planned what i was gunna do and i did it. jamie walked back in the room and had white powder in a bag, before he got closer i shot him 5times. i droped the gun cause ive never done this and i didnt know what to do, my hands had blood on them i cried and screamed but i couldnt rewind time. i needed to run but i knew i didnt have enough time.

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BACK TO KEISHA IN PRISON*

i write letters everyday to my baby kiana but my mum wont let her see them i guess thats just my mum, she didnt want me to have anything to to with kiana. i told her i was getting help but she didnt wanna hear; she completely washed her hands off me. Life was hard in here but i got over it, i had 1week left in prison by now i was looking forward to see my baby kiana but i was worried she wouldnt recognise me, she'd be 8 now. i knew my mum told her lots of lies about me but im gunna make sure she knows i love her.