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"It's ALL your fault! NONE of this would have happened if it wasn't for you!  " My mother screeches at me adding all the venom she can into that last word. " He loved ME! " She continues her rant. "He would be AlIVE! But you KILLED him. MY husband! ITS ALL YOUR FAULT!" She repeats it over and over ......

My fathers suicide

My mothers alchole abuse

Everything

She blames it all on me and I think just for one second  as I stare at her desperate eyes that hold so much hate,revulsion, and detachment from the world.

She may just be right.

Was I the problem.

Did I kill my own beloved father that I dearly loved.

~~~~

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