Johnnies POV
I really shouldn't of done that. Why did u do that? I've been clean for years. I really don't blame Alex for not wanting to be with me. I always screw stuff up. I think she's just saying she didn't mean it for my sake.
"Johnnie?", Alex said.
"Huh?", I guess I was zoning out.
"Be honest, are you okay?", she asked.
"No", I put simply.
"Talk to me", she said while sitting up in the bunk.
"Were you just telling me you didn't mean saying that you didn't want us to be a thing anymore because you felt bad for me?", I asked sternly.
She thought about it for minute.
"Look Johnnie, I'm not really sure what I was thinking, I was overwhelmed. I'm so sorry, please believe me. I love you so much, you know that. If I meant what I said about us then why would I have been crying so hard when you left me at the airport? Johnnie I can't imagine us not being, well, us", she was almost in tears.
I know that right now we are going through something, and I should probably be mad. Seeing her cry still kills me inside like it always does.
I didn't say anything to her, I just put my arms out to hug her and that's when she started crying.
We laid in the bunk for a while longer. Eventually the guys got back so I hurried and got my jacket to cover my bandaged arm.
"Hey guys Alex and I are gonna get food", I said while getting down from the bunk.
"We are?", Alex asked while wiping the makeup from under her eyes.
"Yeah, let's go", I told her. I didn't help her down from the bunk this time, I just walked out of the bus.
Today's venue still wasn't over, it was only 7:00 right now and it ends at 9:00.
We went to catering but before we made it there a giant group of people ran over for pictures and to meet us.
We did that and finally got food.
We sat down and ate inside the building.
"You hate me", Alex blurted out.
"You hate me", I replied, I looked at her.
"I love you", she said.
I just sat and ate my food. Once we were both done I grabbed her hand and pulled her out back to the buses.
I ran inside and grabbed my camera and tripod. I came back out and she followed me to a clear spot behind the busses so we have our privacy.
I set up the camera and pressed record. I went over to where Alex was standing and sat on the ground. I motioned for her to sit next to me. She sat down.
"Hey thugpugs, its me Johnnie, and I'm here with the one and only Aloox.", I laugh. Doing this really does make me happy.
"Hi guys", she waves.
"Johnnie cut this part out, thank you so much. I love you", she tells me, she already knows.
"Okay so I've been wanting to make this video for a long time", I say to the camera.
"I, uh, know that I'll get hate for this, I already have today", I admit.
"I have a girlfriend", I say putting my arm around Alex.
"And I have a boyfriend", Alex says putting her head on my shoulder.
"She is my girlfriend", I say pointing to her.
"He is my boyfriend", she replies, pointing to me.
"So yeah, we've been together for a while now, and we haven't said anything because its really hard to do this, I mean you never know how people will react", I said, looking at Alex.
"Yeah, and when you are a big figure in the internet, I mean we aren't that big of figures but we have a large internet family, but back to the point, when you're a person like that, it's even harder because then some people won't support and you never want to see someone leave a family. Which is what happens when you don't support us because only real friends and family will love you no matter what", she added on.
"Exactly", I agreed.
"But like we said, were rely sorry for keeping this a secret. But no matter what we're staying together because I like her, and I hope she likes me too", I laugh.
"Ehh, he's okay I guess", she said, she was smiling like crazy and that made me so happy, I just wanted us to be happy.
"Okay well Stay happy, not crappy. Life's a bitch don't quit. Peace out thugpugs!" I yelled covering the camera. I turned I off and pulled it off the tripod.
I got up and went to help Alex up. I pulled her up and she wrapped her arms around me and kissed me. It made me forget about all the bad things that have happened lately.
"I think you're a keeper", she said pulling away and giggling.
We walked back to the bus to chill out. When I got inside I immediately started editing the video. I finished in like an hour and showed Alex.
"It's amazing", she told me.
"Im really nervous. Are you ready?", I said hovering the pointer over the upload button.
She matched her hand to mine and clicked upload.
I took a sigh of relief.
She's a keeper.
