Paul X Fieri Adventures

Chapter 8

Intro Theme Music: The Invisible Surfers -The Hunter

Paul blarts insanely fast car squeaked to a halt. Fieri stood right in front of it, surprised he almost got hit "What?!" Blart demanded, confused "She's not Arnold!" Exclaimed fieri Paul blart gasped. "Danmit..get in the car" he ordered. Fieri obeyed When guy came in, blart sped off Guy Fieri was breathing heavily from what he had just done...he just hit an innocent women....beat her up.... Paul Blart swore under his breath "God fucking damn it. I can't believe we thought she was Arnold." Blart said Guy shook his head and looked at the window, at the cool night sky. He felt his heart fill with guilt. "I think...I...I just wanted someone to blame."

Blart raised in eyebrow. "Someone to blame? What do you mean?" Blart reached for the dial on his radio, and turned to a station. A song played called "Sandy Rogers -Fool For Love. Guy fieri took a shaky breath "Someone to blame for what had happened to us. In New Mexico." Fieri shook his head. "I want to believe you, Blart. I do. because I still have feelings for you and everyday I think about you. But I don't want to be hurt again." "Guy, I'll tell you what happened in New Mexico..."

**FLASHBACK STARTING** *flashback** Paul Blart was driving on the hot New Mexico road, ready to meet his boyfriend and lover, Guy Fieri. They had been together for months now He was driving to the bar, The Hot Tamale when his phone vibrated in his pocket. He took it out and raised it to his ear. "Hello?" "Paul..It's your mother." the voice said back Paul Blart gasped. He hadn't heard from his mother or his family in a while. "m-mommy?"

"Listen, I need to talk to you about something. Something that your family and I have been thinking about for some time." Paul Blart bit his lip. Her voice sounded...sad? Like she was going to deliver bad news. "Son, we tried to understand what has been going on with you...but...we just don't understand how you can be dating another man. It's unnatural son.." Paul felt his heart sank. "Mom, you don't have to understand. I wouldn't expect you to understand...these feelings..I've never felt them before." "Listen, Paul. If you don't break up with Guy, we'll...we'll cut you off completely. This little phase isn't going to last long, and I know it. When you stop fooling around with dicks and find a woman to have a family with, then we'll talk again."

His mother hung up. Paul felt tears stinging the corner of his eyes. He shook his head. How could his mother be so cruel? Suddenly, he turned the entire car around, and drove in the opposite direction. He didn't fully realize what he was doing, but he let his feelings guide him. He eventually drove to the strip club, The Pink Flamingo. He went inside, and found himself the nearest girl (Angelina Jolie) and made out with her. He decided he would date her and break up with Guy, to seal up his relationship with his mother and family. *. .

**BACK TO THE STORY** Guy Fieri was surprised by what Paul had just told him. He hadn't realized he was influenced by his own mother to break up with him. "Paul..I'm..I'm sorry." Paul shook his head. "No, I'm sorry. I'm sorry I got drunk. I'm sorry I tried to change who I was to please an old hag. And most importantly, I'm sorry I hurt you. It's the last thing I ever wanted to do.." Guy smiled. "So...would you...want to start over again? You know, start dating?" Paul looked at Fieri longingly.(lol is that even a word lol) "I would...enjoy that, a lot." Ending Theme Music: Blue Swede -Hooked On Feeling