Start again (a spencer reid fanfic)

Seven: Roots

REID'S P.O.V

"Friendships are formed differently, but one thing is the same about them all; They all involve the intertwining of roots"

~ Unknown

*DREAM*

"Thomas Merton" Maeve says as Dianne glares at me angrily
"Who's Thomas Merton? Who is he!?" She screams , inching the gun closer to Maeve's temple
"He knows" Maeve says quietly looking at me with eyes that scream 'sorry' "he knows"......

I feel a hand brush mine and turn around to see Maeve standing behind me,  smiling.
"Hello Spencer" she says
"I can't believe after two years or something I still see you" I says
"You can't erase a memory Spencer" she chuckles and straightens my tie
"I know, I just thought maybe one day I'd finally stop"
"so there's a new girl?"
"Yes and I think I like her" I look downblushing slightly  and Maeve's smiling "Please forget I said that".
There's a long silence and she looks over her shoulder before touching my arm and pointing at something.
"Is that her?"
A few hundred meters away I can see Katrin and I sitting in an SUV talking.
"Yeah, her name's Katrin"
"That's pretty"
"Mmm... Its just she.... It's hard to explain but she's all closed off and doesn't seem to trust anyone"
"Oh I think she trusts you"
"Why?"
"Well if trust is really just the bond we have formed with someone it makes sense that you're the one she trusts".
I turn around when I hear laughing and see Katrin and I on the jet, talking about the case.

"You make her laugh, that's good.... I think" Maeve says and I shrug
"Maybe".
Maeve touches my shoulder gently and I turn to her
"You have to go now Spencer" she says and I frown
"Why?"
"You have to wake up. You have people you have to make laugh".
I look down at my feet
"But we were talking"
"Every Penrose triangle has its thorns"
"Maeve I-"
"Wake up Spencer"

*END OF DREAM*

KATRIN'S P.O.V

"What do you mean 'he lost a lot of blood'?! I know he lost a lot of blood, I was the one in the basement when he got shot!" I yell at the absolute top of my lungs
"Coleman" Hotch pulls me back to the seats in the waiting room
"They're doing everything they can, they don't need people yelling at them" he tells me sternly and I look away
"I know, I just don't want to be the reason someone like Reid dies".
He frowns
"Someone like Reid?"
"He's smart"
"And?"
"Funny, listens, knows what I'm gonna say. He understands".
A smallish smile tugs at Hotch's lips
"Coleman do you like Reid?"
"As a friend, as a teammate"
Hotch gives a slightly sceptical nod and I look away as something inside me gives a pang and the penny drops.
That stupid smile....
"He's outta surgery Hotch" Morgan tells us and we follow him down the hallway, to a room with blindingly white walls and a bed with a complete array of beeping machines and an IV pole around it.
"Is he awake?" I ask and Morgan shakes his head
"Not yet".
I walk over to the blue armchair beside the bed and sit down.
"Coleman it wasn't your fault" Hotch tells me and I look up at him
"I know, I do know, if I hadn't been down there the UnSub would've shot him in the head but..." I shrug looking over at Reid who's frowning deeply even though he's asleep.
"He probably won't wake up for a while" Morgan tells me "do you wanna come with us all to get coffee?"
"No I'm gonna stay here" I tell him and he just backs away slowly, smiling a goofy smile with his hands in the air.
I look back at Spence.
My fault. My fault. All my fault.

*%*%*%*%

12:00PM...

"Katrin?" I look up with half closed eyes that meet a park of tired chocolate ones and lift my head about a millimeter.
"Katrin are you awake?"
When I realize it's Spencer I open my eyes and look up without taking my head off the hospital sheets.
"Mm-hmah?" I mumble with an internal yawn and he smiles weakly
"I know this is gonna be annoying but could you possibly take your head off my arm?"
"M-wah?" I frown, confused
"I have a severe case of pins and needles and I have to go to the bathroom" he explains and I lift my head
"Oh, yeah, sure... Um.... Sorry" I tuck a messy strand of hair behind my ear and my cheeks flush.
"Its fine, the team went back to the hotel and I told them to leave you here" he says, shifting awkwardly so he's sitting in a more comfortable looking position with one leg over the edge of the bed.
"Thanks.... Do you- can you actually walk Reid?" I ask as he tugs against a multitude of machines he's attached to.
"Maybe, we'll see" he says with a small shrug as he detaches himself from the heart monitor and sits as upright as I guess is possible when you've been shot in the stomach.
"Reid I really don't think you should be-"
He stands up shakily and teeters a little, which makes me stand and hold his arm.
He looks at me and frowns
"Hey, I was the reason you got shot, I don't want to be the reason you fall over too" he gives me a strange look
"You weren't the reason I got shot"
"Yeah I was, I was trying to talk down the UnSub when I should've just shot him" I say and Reid shakes his head, grabbing the IV pole and attempting to shuffle his way towards the bathroom door.
"Well what should I have done then? All I had was a gun" I ask sitting back down
"I failed my weapons exam twice before I got a gun" he tells me and I blink
"A friend of mine once told me 'you don't need a gun to kill someone', he was right. But it helps."
With that he shuts the bathroom door and I let my head rest back on the bed.

I. Do. Not. Like. Spencer. Reid.

REID'S P.O.V

When I reemerge, awkwardly hobbling over to my bed, I notice shes fallen asleep with her face in the sheets again, her breathing slow and even.
She's really quite beautiful, I'll admit that. Her long hair has fallen out of its bun and is fanned out around her head, all over where I'm supposed to be sleeping.
Gently, being careful not to wake her up, I brush her hair off the mattress and behind her back before awkwardly sliding into bed and pulling the non-Katrin occupied half of my sheets over myself.
Today's been a long day. Tonight will be an even longer night...

THREE DAYS LATER

"Kid, the nurse said they're gonna get you discharged today" Morgan informs me as he eats all my red Jell-O, making me feel, in a ridiculous sense, utterly furious.
"That's great news" Katrin says as she enters my room  sipping a milkshake "but JJ has some.... Not so great news"
The rest of the team enters my room and I sit on the edge of the bed, my legs dangling in the air.
"Last night there was another car bombing on Gerrard Street-"
"That's two streets from where I live" Katrin observes before whispering "sorry" and letting JJ continue.
"As I was saying, there was a bombing, but this time there was a casualty which is where I let Morgan bring in laptop- Garcia to give you victimology".
"Thank you sweet JJ, but I don't think my victimology skills are too crash hot so I'll leave you to spout all your profile talk and I will show you- exhibit A" behind Garcia an image of a girl with dark hair and blue eyes comes up and Garcia zooms in on her
"Lilian Reeves, 25, lives a very low key, low risk life style, all info being sent to your phones and tablets now- even Reid the technophobe".
The team chuckles at this, all except Katrin who's just staring off out the window.
"Coleman" Hotch snaps her out of her daze
"What?... Sorry"
"Are you okay?" Emily asks her and she nods, biting her thumbnail
"Fine".
From what I could gather on her sleeping pattern the other night, she doesn't sleep well and when she does sleep it's broken into strange intervals of nightmares and moving about a lot or complete silence. So she only really gets about two hours of quality sleep. Fellow insomniac.
We meet eyes briefly before her smokey blue ones dart away quickly, as if she's been caught doing something wrong.
"Is it an official case?" I ask and Hotch shakes his head
"No, we haven't been invited in on it and counter terrorism think they have the culprit"
"Oh, why are you-"
"Exhibit B, and C, and D" Garcia brings up images of three more girls with the same hair color and similar eyes and facial features.
"Right, victimology"
"And there is no victimology in terrorism, not commonly anyway, mainly just vendettas against the government, religion or trying to create panic" Katrin says it quietly, like she's talking to herself.
"Everyone let's get ready for the flight home, we can discuss it more tomorrow- Reid you've been officially discharged" Hotch says and I straighten my crooked tie before following them out, slightly slower than usual, but at least I'm standing right?
"Katrin?" I ask when I notice her standing still in the middle of the room.
"Oh, um... I'm coming" she says, breezing past me.
You don't need a gun to kill someone.....
Which leaves me to wonder- who'd killed her?

We board the jet and take our seats, me sprawled out along the couch and Katrin at the very end, pretending to be asleep as she looks out the window.
As the tendrils of sleep pull me under I wonder what keeps her up for so long at night...

A/N: Hi, OMG my eyes hurt from writing all these chapters today. Goodbye, I have to go write- more.

Vote and comment?

~ Spencer-the-kat