Safe In Your Skin

01

Everyone here is shit. School is the one place where I can hate multiple people at once without even getting to know them at all. It's filled with fake girls who pack on pounds of makeup, boys who are try hards, and teachers who are miserable about teaching the same damn thing over and over again every year.

I'm not the type to think that I'm an outcast or a loser. I fit in with everyone else because I pretend to be like them. I don't want to be the one who is left out or called a freak.

There are people who are actually like that. They avoid everyone at all costs just so they can appear to be the quiet, awkward teenager who reads too many John Green novels.

But today I arrived at school way too early and I am alone on a bench reading a book I bought last weekend. People are staring and probably thinking that I'm also trying to be like one of those people.

I'm not.

Most know me for being loud and throwing parties at my house whenever my dad leaves to our lake house alone.

I'm not popular, nor am I a cocky snob. I keep things to myself because it's better to be cryptic than to be an open book to random people who don't deserve to know anything about you.

There were hardly any people here besides the jocks who like to pass a football around by the benches near the cafeteria. I kept my head down and both my ear buds in my ears so people knew not to come up to me.

It was the last day before winter break which was the only reason why I came to school. I will probably throw another "get together" so everyone can just hang out. I don't run up to random people and invite them. I invite two or three people and it ends up being about twenty to thirty people.

I felt someone sit near me on the bench, so I looked up and saw Jackson smiling down at me. Jackson was my elf looking friend. He has big ears, big eyes, a small nose, and small lips which reminded me of an elf.

"Hey," He breathed out and I could see the heat leaving his mouth and making puffs of fog in the air.

I closed my book and took out one ear bud, "What's up?"

"You actually came to school today. I thought you were going to be gone all week." He ruffled my hair and placed a black beanie on his head. "What brings you here today?" He flung his backpack out in front of him on the table.

"I might throw another get together," I scrunched my nose and fixed my now messy hair. "Just don't invite a shit ton of people this time." I sighed and he chuckled.

"Why didn't you come to school this week?" He sounded more serious all of a sudden.

"Uh," I placed the book on the table. "Too lazy to care?" I shrugged and all he did was stare. He wouldn't let me get away with short and dumb answers.

"What does your dad think?" He took his phone out from his back pack and glanced down to check for the time. I never really cared enough to be at school and waste my time on things that I won't need in the future. My dad tried so hard to get me on track, but its almost impossible to convince me to do things I dislike.

I shrugged my shoulders and looked at whatever was in front of me. I could feel Jackson staring at me, but I wasn't going to have a conversation about school this early in the morning. It became so awkward that I couldn't stand it anymore.

I grabbed my book from the table, got up, and left. I felt bad for leaving him at the table all alone, but almost every time he comes and talks to me, its about school or about how I'm doing back home. I cared about my dad, just not about school. There's a difference.