Open Letter

To team d(th)irty

Dearest miefs, yeye fans, etc..

Sorry in advance for this total nonsense.

To kief...ly fans,

I have 3 realizations and I think these are something you can ponder on..

1. Why Team Thirty?

Seriously, guys? Thirty talaga? As in 3 & 0? 3 as in 3? Yung number ng jersey ng girl na favorite nyong topic? And 0? You know what zero means? It means having no measurable or otherwise no determinable value, inf. A totally insignificant person (The American Heritage Roget's Thesaurus,2014) parang kayo. Pwede rin zero, as in wala, parang kayo pa rin, walang magawa. Going back, bakit nga Thirty? Do you know na voiced th makes the d sound (Seattle learning academy, 2011) so it's very common for non-english native speakers to make a mistake pronouncing "thirty" as dirty, but since nagaral kami, alam naming thirty yan. Haha!

Okay, so for the third time, bakit nga thirty? If you're going to say kasi 2 x 15 = 30... wow ha! Nagbrainstorm kayo, very pinagisipan naman pala. Pag silang dalawa, multiplication agad naiisip nyo? Maganda yan, makakatulong sa ekonomiya ng Pilipinas. So if 2 and 15 will ask you, "why/what's team thirty?" you'll say, "kasi.. 2 x 15 = 30 ehehe" and they will be like, "umm okay.." SERIOUSLY? ANONG NAKAKAKILIG DOON?! If ever I'm on your side (which I'm glad I'm not btw), I'd suggest better options but since I'm mabait...

Here, Why not use addition instead? Pwede naman 2 + 15 = 17, then 1 + 7 = 8 Oh, ha! I just made an infinity sign! Bagay sa pakulo nyong kieflITIMity! You can even call them 8team or eighteam (yes, it is pronounced as ITIM don't you dare ask me why). So if ever they will ask you why 8team you have some logical nakakakilig explanation to say. Di ba?

Another is subtraction, 15 - 2 =13 For the superstitious, this number brings bad luck or misfortune. According to Walmsley (2011), 13 is a karmic number. Oops! Ayan na si Karma, sige wag muna tayo jan. haha! Isipin nyo nalang malas pag wala si 2 sa buhay ni 15, pero ang iisipin ko syempre vice versa.

Let's try division kaya, (kasi gusto ko sila i-divide haha! Joke lang, half meant yan), 2 ÷ 15 = 7.5 since ang biblical meaning ng 7 is perfection and completeness, pwede nyo na rin yan i-apply sa idols nyo since ganyan naman tingin nyo sa kanya, di ba? But wait, there's more! Merong .5!! kasi nga NOBODY'S PERFECT! Gets?

Pero kung ako tatanungin nyo (obviously hindi mangyayari), mas gusto ko yung equation na (cos(sin(15tan(2))) = 0 you know why? Kasi ang COS ng SIN ni 15 ay ang TAN na si 2. Oh diba? Napasok ko pa yun! Yung zero? Please see first paragraph.

2. Bluer than blue

Alam nyo ba na, the intuitive metaphors "feeling blue" or "getting the blues" refers to sadness and depression (Bourn, 2011). According to studies, an individual's mood/feelings can affect its blue-yellow axis. Oo, merong studies, check nyo sa google, mag research kayo, by "research" I mean, you gather facts hindi yung mga kwentong barbero nyo na nakuha nyo kung saan-saang blogs, pixilated video, feelingerong mascot ni Jollibee or whatever. Not everything you see sa internet ay totoo, same as the color blue alone cannot make a colorful world. Yes, you can idolize them; make them your inspirations, but geez! You have to get a life, hindi mo kailangan i-stalk ang exes nila and even whereabouts nila as if kayo yung other half ng relationship. Hello? Kayo ba yung ex? Better focus on being better and add some color in your lives. Hindi puro blue, blue, blue! Alam nyo yung kanta ni Blue yung Best in me? Kayo, you're making the worse for your idols, and yes, bluer than blue, matinding kalungkutan dinudulot nyo sa kanila. It shows kaya sa faces nila. Haha! Okay, medyo mean ako dun. Sorry.

3. Illusion, Assumptions, Perception vs. Reality

Gusto ko lang malaman nyo na iba po ang maganda sa mabait, mabait sa magaling, flirt sa friendly, for real sa for reel, at lalong malayo ang pagkakaiba ng friends lang sa magkarelasyon. Don't tell me hindi nyo alam pino-point out ko dito or else yayain ko kayo magcoffee papalunukin ko lang kayo ng isang gallon ng realidad. If hindi nyo alam mga ibig sabihin nyan, better check sa google, ask nyo idol nyo or buy any Filipino dictionaries available in bookstores nationwide. Kung wala kayong time, bawasan nyo yung time nyo for your insecurities and negativities tapos lend some time naman sa pagmuni-muni kung pano uunlad ekonomiya ng Pilipinas, Paano mababawasan yung traffic sa Manila pati mga bagahe na palaging dala-dala ng idol nyo sa ilalim ng kanyang mga mata and lastly, kung pano tataas rating ng show nila. Pabayaan nyo na si Mika, di nya na need time nyo, maganda na sya. Btw, Illusions distort reality. Some illusions are based on general assumptions the brain makes during perception.

Oh, Ayan ah. 3 yan! Kasi 3 is better than 2. I hope 15 gets a lot of 3s today and sa mga future nya pang laro ;)

Sincerely,

Miktionaryo