four • selfish

164 17 0
                                    

"What do you mean
you let him run
across the street like that?"
mum is angry
all because of you.

"I... I'm sorry"
you say
faking your sadness
you're not sorry

"Lou,"
I feel my sister
hold my hand
she's crying
because of you

"The doctor said
he isn't going to
wake up, Harry!
what did you do?
my poor baby!"

mum is sobbing
all because of you
my dear mum
you caused her pain
you caused all of us pain

She grabs my other hand
her sobs taking over
shaking her
tearing through her
breaking her

I want to wake up
from this place of
in between
for her
and I want to
leave you
so you can die
knowing you have sinned

"Oh Lou
Lou
Lou
Lou!"

It pains my heart
to hear her cry my name
like this
you must pay

"I-"
you say
I think
it's best if you keep
your mouth shut.
"I'm sorry"

are you really?
are you really
sorry?

"Don't cry mum
I have faith
that he'll wake up"
Lottie says
and I want to wake up
for my family
not you
you are no longer
my family.

The door swings open
I cannot hear your uneven breaths
you decide to run
again
coward

How can you
leave me here
alone
to listen
to my mum cry
to my sister wailing
my name

How can you be
oh
so
selfish

How can you be
so
unbelievably
evil?

How can you be
someone
I
once
loved?

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