The Life Of A Breadstick

Chapter 2

Hey guise. Im back againn woopity woop woop! Woop. Ok so Obviously my updates will be slow because Im just a terrible breadstick ya know.

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"MooooOooOoOoOom!"

"WHAT!"

"Hi."

"Good grief, Carb. Get a life."

"That's the point, mum. I don't have one."

"Duh. That's why I just told you to get one. Now go do something with yourself some where else. I don't want people to think you're my son."

"Gee thanks. One day Ill be famous and no one will believe you that Im your son." The breadstick scoffed.

He trudged off into his room and picked up his guitar. ( I think its established by now that we all know he doesn't have arms.)

He strummed a few chords and hummed along. Then he opened his mouth to start singing "Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Star".

The neighbors probably mistake his voice as one of an angel's, but they boy is certainly gifted.

No one can sing punk rock nursery rhymes as well as he could. Especially that sassy pink kitten, which is probably why they hate each other. Pure jealousy.

During dinner, the whole bread family enjoyed dinosaur shaped chicken nuggets with macaroni and cheese.

They talked about all kinds of things, from making fun of Harry Style's shoes to getting emotional over the death of their pet rock. R.I.P Pepe. You'll be missed.

The next day was yet again, Wednesday. No, the breadstick was not wearing pink, silly goose. Didn't you know breadsticks like to be naked?

It was the day Carb had to tutor the dumb kiwi fruit.

The session started off like every session did, tears, and lots of them. You'd think the kiwi would be tough and get with it, but he is all talk. He can't even tell you what number comes after 2. I mean come on, Pepe could've done better than that.

"Come on, Kiwi. You can do it. Just concentrate. What comes after 2?"

"I-I don't- kn-know!" The kiwi said between sobs.

"Yes you do. We've been over this. You just have to remember. Like I taught you, count your chest hairs."

"One. *sob* two *sob* ehhh thirty?"

"You wish." Said the breadstick under his breath. "I mean no. Its three, Kiwi."

"Oh yeah, now I remember." The Kiwi replied while sniffling.

Not only did the boy have a lack of chest hair, he had a lack of a brain too.

Now that that's over with for the day, as a reward for the kiwi finally remembering he has 3 chest hairs, Carb took him to meet up with the bandana, Kerchief.

This time they weren't creeping on him from the basement window. Carb rang the door bell by the front door and swayed back and forth like he had to take a leak.

After what felt like a year, the door swung open to the bandana, once again, giggling like a hyena.

"Dude, why the heck do you laugh so much? Theres nothing funny going on.", Carb complained.

"Yes there is. You just showed up." Kerchief joked. "I see you've brought your friend. Hi, Im Kerchief. I used to work at KFC."

"Hey" the kiwi said softly.

Carb groaned loudly. "Oh my gosh, Kerchief. You can't just tell people that you just met that you used to work at KFC!"

"I do what I want. I'm punk rock." Kerchief retorted.

"Whatever. Can we just go in already?"

"Fine. Come in. I've got everything set up in the basement. I hope you don't mind that Kitty is here."

Carb abruptly stopped walking. "WHO?"

"I'm sure you've met him. He's the pink kitten that lives down the street from us."

"I know who you're talking about. But why, of all beings, are you friends with that thing?" Carb questioned. "He's a weirdo."

"Hey. Don't talk about him like that. He was a loyal customer." Kerchief stated, crossing his arms over his chest.

"Guys, can we start doing what we came here to do?" Kiwi pleaded.

"Alright fine. This way."

Kerchief directed them through his house, down to his basement where the kitten was shredding on the electric guitar. Jk he could only do wimpy power chords. But hey. Its still something.

"YOU. Kerchief, you didn't tell me he was coming.", Kitten spat.

Uh oh.

~

Ooooo cat fight. Anyway thank you guys for voting on my last chapter! I feel like saying "If you liked this video, give it a thumbs up and subscribe to my channel" but, since this is a book Im gonna say " If you liked this chapter, give it a vote and follow my account." Good night everybody