PART 1
Dear diary,
Well today my mum bought me this diary to write about what goes on in my life, she wants to remember all the good times in my life, she wants me to happy. Well I can start with this, my life isn't very happy; well I'm not happy with it anyway. I guess by remembering happy times I should remind myself of whom I am and whom I will become. My name is Suzette, but people call me Lily. I’m 13 years old; I live in a little suburban town in Sydney, Australia. I don’t have many friends at all. But it’s not their fault. I wouldn’t blame them for being afraid of me. But I have always wondered what it was that made them afraid. Is it because I have auburn hair and bright green eyes, can’t be how ridiculous and childish. Anyway back to my life, my mum thinks that this diary can help me, well let’s see…
Dear diary,
I don’t many good memories will be written upon these empty pages, rather they will be filled with hatred. Well I guess part of remembering includes not only good memories but bad ones too. Unfortunately I live with a very unkind and selfish man. He has been living off my mother for more than 20 years. Stealing her money, using her for his selfish desires, and treating her like a worthless animal caring for him like a child. And he doesn’t like it that I have found my voice and use it to stand up for my mother. I don’t understand what she is afraid of, does she think that if she leaves him he will follow her, hunt her down and kill her or something? It’s pathetic. Then I try to tell her that I am unhappy but she doesn’t listen, she thinks that I’m being selfish. Anyway, today he got his allowance from my mum because he doesn’t work and he needs to put fuel in the car because my mum doesn’t drive it. After being given the money he walked off picked up the car keys and drove off, not telling us where he was going and not knowing when he would return. I guess I really longed for these moments without him around, trying to convince my mum to run away with me. Anyway after I heard him leave I walked up to my mum and said “Mum why is it that whenever he asks for money you just give it to him, even if it’s all that you have to survive on for the whole week for all of us? And then after you give him money and he spends it all you give him more? He doesn’t even do anything. He doesn’t work, clean the house, and cook meals. All he does is sit on his lazy bottom, watch TV, eat, sleep and spend money leaving us to survive on pieces of bread and wear clothes with holes and tears in them that don’t even fit anymore?” Mum slammed her hands down on the kitchen table, spilling her cup of tea. She then looked at me and shouted, “Why is that each time he is involved in something you have to comment and make me feel terrible about every little thing I do? It’s like you don’t want me around or everything I do, you don’t think is good enough, or isn’t what you want?” Her eyes started to water. She just stood there starting at me, guilt and pain in her eyes. I couldn’t handle this anymore. I snapped. “I NEVER SAID IT WAS YOUR FAULT DID I? Why is it so hard for you to opened up your eyes and see that you are making us suffer to make you happy. Can’t you see that we have to live in poverty to please him? I don’t understand why you are still with him. No I’m not being selfish I’m talking on behalf of this family. I think it’s time to wake up from your happy little perfect dream and come back to reality, because its sinking in hard for me and I’ve had enough.“ I then stormed out of the room about to burst into tears. My trail has leaded me here, to this little black and worthless diary. You’re probably my only friend now.
