To my beautiful Cesca,
I know you've been feeling down and well, for lack of a better term, like shit for the past few months. I mean yes, it's the minority of the time, but it's those times when you do feel like shit that make me realise just how strong and amazing you are.
Do you remember the time we went to that lake for the weekend? Do you remember that night I gave you your promise ring? Do you remember the night I took you back there and replaced that ring with the engagement ring you have on your finger now?
I know these past few months have been hard sweetheart. I promise you it'll get harder from now on. I promise you there will be hard times, and I promise you that sometimes we'll be feeling frustrated, angry and tired of and with each other.
But I promise you that despite all of that. Despite the inevitably of fights and rough times ahead; I'll always be here with you and for you. That will never change sweetheart.
I've loved you ever since you hooked your fishing rod hook into my chest on that fishing trip. I've loved you since my ex-best friend sunk his grimy fingers into you and hurt you the way he did. I've loved you for years and I'm glad I got the ball to ask you to be mine and to stop being such a dick to you three years ago.
You know that I suck at writing but I promised you I would tell everybody that I love you. This is only part one of that promise being fulfilled. You thought I was being a stupid idiot when I was 17 and told you that didn't you? Well sweetheart, prepare to have your mind blown hard.
So I figured I want to show everybody and you just how much I do love you and just how beautiful a person you are inside and out, so I'll list a few things I love about you:
1. I love the way you say my name. In the mornings, at nights, when you need me, when you yell at me, when you nag at me, when you moan my name, or the way you say it when you're frustrated at me. It doesn't matter how you say it. I love every single way.
2. I love the way you fidget when you try to downplay or lie to me. You rub your thigh and play with the hem of your shirt or dress, and sometimes you twirl your hair and 'look for split ends'
3. I love the way you sing and hum whenever you're in the shower
4. I love the way you dance and laugh when you bake and cook; I even love the fact that you make a huge mess in the kitchen afterwards
5. I love your laugh, it's infectious and beautiful, and I love the little hiccup that you have when you laugh too much
6. I love your giggles and squeals
7. I love your touch, your hands are soft and small, delicate. They feel so different to mine and I feel like the luckiest guy on earth when you squeeze my hand tight in yours
8. I love the way you bury yourself against my side when we watch scary movies or just movies and tv in general
9. I love the way you sneak up on me when I'm studying
10. I love the way you kiss my neck to calm me down and it instantly makes me happy
11. I love the way you whine about getting up too early
12. I love the beautiful glow about you, you're so full of life: ethereal in a way
13. I love the way you dress
14. I love the way you pull me around and make me dance with you
15. I love the way you smell; you smell like vanilla and citrus
