Abeyance

Chapter 2

I opened my eyes. My whole body hurt. I closed my eyes again and tensed up my body. I tried to roll over, but I was stuck. I opened my eyes again. I lifted my head as much as I could and looked around. I was in a completely white room—whiter than any of the rooms I was in before. The door was metal and had all these fancy metal locks on it. I was on a bed, strapped down in the very center of the room. Nothing else was in the room except for a very bright light above me and a wooden chair by the door. There wasn’t even a window. I sighed. I looked around a little more. The walls, like usual, felt like they were closing in on me. But these ones in this room were worse—they were so close to me that I felt like I could barely breathe. I felt like I was suspended, just below the ceiling. I just really wanted to know where the hell I was.

            I lay there for what seemed like forever and then there was finally a knock on the door. I was so relieved. I didn’t really expect anyone to come. All the walls faded away, and my suspension ended, and I was lowered back onto the bed—reality.

            “Come in!” I yelled.

It was Dr. Peters.

Dr. Peters was always a pretty lady, her hair was long and brown and it always stayed in place. Her blue eyes contradicted her hair, but really complimented her smile. She was beautiful—something I’ll never be. But today, there was something a little different about Dr. Peters—she wasn’t smiling like she always was. She actually looked frightened: something I’d never seen in her. Seeing her like that made me afraid of what came next.

When she saw me, she half smiled to try to reassure me, but it didn’t really work to be honest. But I half smiled back, to try and reassure her frightened look as well.

She grabbed the chair and put it next to the bed I was on. She unstrapped me from the bed, and I almost felt like I could suspend again. It felt amazing. I massaged my wrists and sat up. She sat down on the chair and smiled at me. The bed was so high up and she looked so far away from me. She sighed, wrote something down in her notebook, and then looked back up at me again.

“Mya, can you tell me the last thing you remember?” She said, looking at me. It kind of looked like she had tears in her eyes. I was frightened the second I saw the tears. That was one thing I never expected to see—tears from Dr. Peters.

“I asked Ashley for my blanket and went to sleep. I was looking at the white ceiling imagining it falling in on me and well… I woke up to a different white ceiling,” I looked up at it as I spoke.

She scribbled a little bit in her notebook as I spoke, but this time, she really looked at me. She looked at me sort of deeply. She sighed and wrote one more thing down. She looked at me and put the notebook on the floor, “Well, Mya… that’s not the last thing that happened,” She sighed. She started crying a little. “Mya, you know I really care about you, right? You know you’re not just some patient, right? I really do care if you get better. I want you to get better as soon as possible.”

I nodded.

“Okay Mya, well we need to go over what happened last night because that’s not what happened. No one really knows exactly what happened. Ashley came to check on you like is required, and you were not there. Security was called and you were not found on premises. The police were then called, and you were found on the side of the road screaming for help. They brought you back here, and you were placed here. They had to strap you down and tranquilize you because you would not cooperate, and you were just screaming at the top of your lungs. Do you remember any of this Mya?”

I shook my head. I really didn’t remember. But that makes sense as to why I am here.

She sighed, and she really started to cry. “Your mother, Mya…” She shook her head as if in denial. “She’s passed away, Mya.”