Stains and Stories

Who cares?

I try to convince myself ,

"You are not alone "I repeat continuously ,

Yet when I reach my bed at night and finally collapse,

Desolation hugs me ,

rather than a castle of blankets ,

My head is comforted by a sea of thoughts ,

rather than the soft pillow ,

And the pain that my heart holds ,

Often makes me wonder which one is true : Am I on the mattress or is it the one suffocating me?

And then when I wake up and look around ,

I search frantically to find someone who cares ,

What I find is my reflection staring back at me ,

And when I stand alone ,

my shadow never leaves me ,

After a night of endless thoughts ,

it comes to me all too suddenly ,

Me ,

I am the one who understands myself ,

Me ,

I am the one who will be there constantly no matter what ,

Me ,

I am the only one who truly cares ,

So , I stopped convincing myself ,

Because , in the end ,I am all alone ,

With no one but me .

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A/N : Honestly, the guilt has been present , right? I haven't updated in a while - that is probably an understatement . But actually , I was at loss of words and creativity.

But I am back . Kinda.